Dating : Unconditional love

I’m getting tired of dating being portrayed

as an impossible task, a code you have to crack, a mystery we have yet to solve!

Love isn’t complicated. We are.

We have to stop being so scared of everything and doing things grudgingly, should not be done at all. For example, men paying for dates. It is the bane of my existence to hear guys say “if she isn’t ok with fast food, she isn’t my type”. I wish I could make this behavior up. I have heard guys say/post this.

In fact, while I was at the barbershop, my barber brought up this very topic. “Men get it harder because we have to pay for everything”. Being the inquisitive person I am, I asked my questions. How did he dress? Where did they go? Did he open doors? Did she suggest it? How did she dress/act? How did the night go overall? Etc. After we got past the date, I broke down the “glo up” process! The makeup men say they don’t care about, doing our hair, the heels, perfume, ALLADAT! Without hesitation he replied with a venomous “I have to pay for you to put on perfume and makeup?!”. No. Never. You don’t pay for anyone to get ready. You’re investing in the experience. Had she not gotten ready, went there straight from work, that would have been the first and last date. You have to appreciate effort from the person you’re pursuing. It’s setting a precedent for future efforts that may or may not come if it goes unrecognized. This example is basic, but it’s about positive reciprocity. If someone keeps putting their best foot forward, and you step on it… that foot will be in your a**.

Don’t take chivalry for granted!

Anything someone does for you is not obligated. Stop tainting beautiful gestures.

I love hard, it’s who I am. I go 100% for a person I’m interested for multiple reasons

• They’ll know what they’re getting into if we become exclusive
• If my time is limited, I don’t want the feeling of regret. Not feeling like I did enough
• Me loving someone out loud does more for my spirit than the person I’m showing love. Knowing that I’m capable of something so powerful and selfless is awe inspiring.

Taking someone’s kindness for granted is definitely trending. Im not sure where the disconnect came from, but people showing kindness does not make them a target to feed your ego. You could be the most amazing person, but no one owes you anything. On that same note, continue to be an amazing person, because it doesn’t cost you anything.

Being cold because “I’ve been hurt too much” “People have to work for it” “I have trust issues” is bogus. I should know, I’ve used ALL of these lines, and I got the same trash that I put out. I put it into my mind that everyone was bad, so that was the only thing I would attract. The only thing you’re doing is retraumatizing yourself and could very well damage someone else. You may think you’re saving yourself for “the one”, but chronic victimology has never ended with a happily ever after. GO FEEL SOMETHING!!!! APPRECIATE SOMEONE! *shakes fist*

Hindsight is 20:20! But the chances of you getting something back after you broke it, is 50:50.

Again, love is not complicated. We make it complicated by placing terms and conditions on an ambiguous term. LOVE! If you think about the person, say so. If you want to give them the world, don’t be afraid to do so! If it doesn’t work, you know you’re capable of that love, which means you’re capable to do it 1000x’s more.