h2>Dating : Just Saying ‘Hi’
Since I don’t feel like I can say it anywhere else
Hey, so this is weird, right?
I don’t know why I’m asking. I know it’s weird, you know it’s weird… I guess I just wanted to to acknowledge it.
It’s strange to go from being able to send whatever message I want whenever I want, to suddenly — I don’t know, feeling like I have to censor myself, or even just not say anything.
I’m not upset though!
I feel like I have to make sure I say that because I know you worry. You worry that you’re hurting me, and it’s sweet — I like that about you. And I appreciate your concern, but I’m okay.
Really.
This is just strange and I’m still getting used to it.
It’s a silly thing to miss someone you’ve never met, isn’t it? But it isn’t silly to feel like you miss an experience you had, and I suppose that’s what we’re missing. (See how I’m not assuming that I’m the only one missing it…)
I’ve been reading stories from the adultery subreddit (guess that’s a way I’ve chosen to connect with you from afar), and I’m relating to all the ‘missing’ that’s going on in there.
Except again, those people have met their partners, and we haven’t.
Does it ever concern you —
I was about to say, ‘that this is just fantasy,’ but that’s what affairs are, I’m told. They’re fantasies. Because you don’t live your life with this person. You get all the good things — the exciting things — and none of the everyday life things.
So maybe it doesn’t matter if we’ve hyped each other up in our minds. Because it’s not like reality is ever going to be a problem.
At most, we’ll eventually get to see each other for a couple of days — not long enough to undo most of the fantasy, which means that theoretically we get to keep those idealized versions of each other for as long as we’d like to.
Unless the real real world gets in the way. But there’s no need to dwell on that.
I still hope you’ll come here, you know. Just the thought of it just now got me excited…
I want to be seen the way you’ll see me, appreciated the way you’ll appreciate me, and touched the way you’ll touch me.
But for now, I just wanted to say hi.
