Dating : Lather, Rinse and Don’t Repeat

Lather, Rinse and Don’t Repeat

All is well in the neighborhood. Everyone on the block has taken in their trash and recycling containers. Which is why mother has turned her attention to me. I have dedicated shelves in the kitchen and refrigerator for my food items. I also have one dedicated drawer that contains my scale and a few miscellaneous kitchen gadgets.

I share mother’s bathroom because her bathroom has a low entry shower which is important for me as I have limited mobility and it allows me easy access to the shower and the shower bench. I keep several items in her shower — shampoo, conditioner and body wash.

When I opened my kitchen gadget drawer the other day I noticed mother had rearranged my drawer once again. The reason she looks in the drawer is because she unloads the dishwasher and puts things away. I really don’t have a choice in the dishwasher unloading matter — mother runs it when she feels like it and then immediately unloads it the minute the wash function stops even though she can select the “dry” cycle. “This is how I get my steam facial” she says. (I don’t want to deprive mother of her beauty treatments.)

The other day mother came out from her bathroom holding my shampoo bottle. “Is this empty?” she asked. There was one little dab of shampoo left in the shampoo bottle. “No mom, there’s a little bit left.” I said. I am very good about getting empty bottles into the recycling and I thought it was strange that she would ask me. I know the reason she lifted the bottle was because she “styles” her shower and was arranging my items as attractively as she could just in case a stranger would use her bathroom and look in the shower. That is how mother thinks. She is constantly thinking with an Architectural Digest mind.

Because I knew I would use up my shampoo the next time I showered, I got the new bottle of shampoo out and put it on “my” shower shelf. Just out of curiosity I lifted mother’s shampoo bottle and it was emptier than mine! This woman has too much time on her hands. Not only is she the self-appointed neighborhood safety watch person, trash container monitor and Bibi tracker, she is now the official shampoo police. I am thankful the corona virus quarantine has been lifted in our town — she will once again be able to resume her regular activities and, hopefully, I will be able to lather and rinse without repercussions.