Dating : The Importance of Pride Month

Most of how we differ is completely artificial.

These artificial differences include skin color, gender, religion, nationality, sexual orientation, political affiliations, religion, age, weight, and on and on and on.

Even the literal differences are not so clearly black and white and well defined as they get made out to be. Most of our impressions of “the other” are complete bullshit.

The stigma attached to the LGBTQA+ community is not simply unfair — it’s unrealistic. This is why Pride Month — and bringing attention to those who are part of this community — is important.

But it’s not just important to those who identify as LGBTQA+ etc. It’s important to everyone because all human beings are impacted by how we treat one another.

Before I go on, I want to make one thing perfectly clear. I am a straight, white, middle-aged, cis-gendered male. I am, however, an ally to anyone who identifies as LGBTQA+, etc. As such, I will stand by your side and demand the rights you are utterly entitled to.

I’d like to address a couple of ugly misconceptions people hold.

I am wired to identify as male and straight because I like to have sex with women. That’s part of my wiring — not a choice. My instinct, my desire, my identity, are all made up that way and tied together.

I have gay, transgender, and bisexual friends. They are wired the way they are in the same way that I am wired how I am.

I know two people who were born male. Both are in various stages of transitioning to females because that’s how they are wired.

Several of my friends identify as non-binary. Again, this isn’t a choice — they are wired to identify with both male and female — as well as neither.

Lots of my friends are bisexual. They are attracted to people regardless of their gender. This isn’t a choice — it’s how they are wired.

I might not be wired in the same way — but why does that matter? It doesn’t. How you identify yourself, who you are attracted to, and the like, has zero impact on me and my life.

There is a lot of fear from people who espouse the “norm”. Many point to religion and blind faith in allegory to justify their misunderstanding and lack of interest in seeking understanding. Unfortunately, some lawmakers use these fears to pass horrid, discriminatory laws — which is why Pride Month is as important as it is.

One of the longtime, utterly false narratives is that you can be “turned” gay. That is utterly untrue. You are the sexual orientation you are.

Yes, it can shift with time and experience. But that’s not because someone “turns” you — it is because you have developed more mindfulness and self-awareness.

Lots of people are straight only because that’s what was expected of them.

Let’s be perfectly clear — there is no gay agenda. I know I am not gay and cannot state this with absolute certainty. However — I am pretty sure the gay agenda is EXACTLY the same as the straight agenda:

Live the best life you can with as many options and opportunities as possible.

Anyone who identifies as LGBTQA+ wants nothing more than to be accepted for who they are. They want to just live their lives with the same opportunities, potential, and possibilities as everyone else. The single biggest difference is that — in many ways — they know themselves better than other people do.

“The gays” are not trying to destroy your way of life. They are not attempting to turn your children gay. And do you know what transgender people want to do in the bathroom? Use the bathroom to relieve themselves. They are not there to perv on you.

Because I chose theatre in college, have been sometimes flamboyant, and am an open ally — I’ve been hit on by gay men. Did this injure me in some way, make me less of a man, or otherwise ruin my life? No. I was flattered — but disinterested. End of story.

You cannot be turned gay just like you can’t be turned another color. I am not about to wake up one morning and say, huh, I’m black now. I mean, my skin is a slightly more Semitic shade of white — but still white.

Being LGBTQA+ does not make a person perverted, evil, or otherwise bad. All it does is acknowledge how they are wired.

Gay marriage has zero impact on straight marriage. Love is love, people. Everyone should have the right to express that.

I won’t even go into a discussion of wiring regarding monogamy versus polyamory and other relationship models.