Dating : What wast the best relationship advice you ever got ?

Relationship are the most important part of our life. I always used to think, why people get married may be for a companion, a friend for life, financial stability,

But it comes with lot of responsibilities. So few advices which i Try to follow are as follows:

1. Live and let live – Never stop your partner from doing what they wants to do like going out with family, friends specially “bro” friends. Othervise, if we will keep on stoping them, they will become disgruntled and your relationship will become poisonous.

But it doesnt mean you shouldn’t be his priority. He should be able to maintain equality and he should also prioritize you as you are going to spend your entire life together.

And also give space and get space. Do what you love. Dont sacrifice significantly. Otherwise you will die from inside.

2. Have a separate life beside your husband – Have a social life. Have a office life. Have a personal life like any classes, yoga, going out, ngo activities etc.

You should never depend on any one person in your life. That person will start taking you for granted. He will not respect you. As he knows, you will not leave him. So Never depend.

3. Speak up – Communcation is the key in any relationship. Always speak up what you feel. Communicate, say it. Otherwise things will pile up and u will burst one day. Convey your desires, expectations.

4. Never compare – Never compare your partner with anyone. If you want him to do anything, convey but dont compare. Comparison will make him feel negative, as if he is good for nothing. This will make the negativity flow in your relationship.

5. Never blame – Blaming never helps. Self check is very important in every relationship. Blaming hits the cofidence of your partner and its futile.

Instead focus on solutions. Work together on solutions.

6. Caring – kindness and caring should be natural. Its very important in an relationship to be felt cared. In the hour of need, you and your partner should be available for each other.

7. Understanding – I dont say that you and your partner will understand each other 100%. But atleast you both should try to understand each other.

9. Trust – For me trust is the pillar of any relationship. If there is no trust, there is no relationship.

And there shouldn’t be any space for Infedility. If you want to cheat on your partner.leave him and then do whatever you want to.

10. Respect and self respect – If you are not able to respect your partner and he doesn’t respect you. Relationship is useless. In fact there is no relationship.

Respect should be for his nature, behaviour, attitude not for money.

Every couple fights. But if it hits your Self respect, then you should rethink whether you should stay in relation or move on. Your self respect is very important for your thyself. If you are not respected in relation, then move on.

11. Fights – Every couple fights. But the fight should be for the betterment of each other, for the betterment of relationship.

And the fight should be for the relationship. If both of you dont want to save the relationship ,then its better to move on.

Fight shouldn’t be for humiliating each other or downgrading each other. If it is so then leave.

12. Changing the partner – One thing which is the ultimate truth is, you cannot change anyone except yourself.

See you try to tell your partner that your this habbit is bad or untolerable then your partner should try to change for the relationship or you should try to change. The change should be for each other love and betterment of relationship.

But if you are being changed or you are being trying to change your partner in such a way that you have forgotten yourself or your partner has forgotten himself. Then its better to leave and let go.

13. Acceptance and expectations – You should accept your self the way you are and love your self. Then only you can love someone else.

And you should accept your partner completeley otherwise you cannot love him. You both can only try to improve for betterment of your relationship.

Expectations are normal. But are very painful. Try to reduce your expectations as far as possible. Because people and situations will never be according to us.

14. Self dependent – Become fully self dependent. As i said dont depend. Dont depend neither emotionally, physically, financially, socially nor in any other way. Be independent.

Then, be in relationship. That relationship will be free, unconditional, full of acceptance

15. Step of Marriages – Remember if you are not fullfilled you cannot satisfy someone else.

Work on your self first, before taking that step of marriage. First be happy with yourbeat friend which is you.

You are the hero of your own story.

16. Out of box – you know relationship becomes beautiful, when you find your soulmate. With whom you feel complete. Your searchings comes to an end. You feel fulfilled.

I dont know whether will get such partner who gives us that extra care, extra attention, extra love, extra pampering, extra…… that out of box meeting, extra efforts, support.

17. Comfort and compatibility – Dont settle for person with whom you dont feel that compatibility and comfort. Your partner should be that place, where you can go when you feel depressed and down, to lighten up your life.

The first person with whom you want share everything, every small details. Who has all the solutions to your problem. Who is there.

Whi can give you jadu ki jhappi, you when he is there, there is no fear. There is 100% transparency.

You know he is yours, you are his.

18. Dont try to control – Give advices, help and support in all possible manner. But dont force your decisions. Let them decide for themselves. You just give pros and cons. And set them free to take the decisions.

Ps.

Fights in relationships

1. Most of the fights between couples happens due to their relatives and their interference. Don’t let it affect you both.

2. Fight for the present issues not past

3. Girls are like if you have planned. Fulfill it. Othervise don’t make promises.

4. Continuously complaining about the anything irritates the next person.

5. Never fight and create scene in front of others. No one means no one.

6. Never talk about your relationship problems with anyone. Anyone means anyone. It creates negative vibrations.

Love

Feeling of dead in relationship, with the right person, you will feel alive.

If we love someone we want to do things for people, to make them happy and takes efforts

Relationships:

1. Trust

2. We must Respect each other, it shows in how sensitively we treat each other.

3. Understanding the situation of each other by stepping into the shoes of each other.

4. Space. That is freedom to live, make their own choice, not suffocating each other. Give up the feeling to control others. Let them live the way they want obviously not against basic principles of trust, loyalty, respect etc. You don’t own them. As if they will do as you say.

5. Care. Relationship is like a plant, it needs lots of care to nourish it.

6. Proactive. We have to be proactive in a relationship to prevent it from becoming dry and boring. We have to continuously invest in people.

7. Happiness. It’s not necessary ki two people should get happiness from each other only, they can have happiness in different places as well. But they both should support each other in their growth. Be a part in each other’s growth.

8. Behave. When we are over familiar with people, we forget how important they are and the correct way to behave with them.

9. Anger: Sometimes when we come from office, we are pissed off, we are frustrated and tired. At that point of time some time we fight over trivial matters and the matter magnifies and becomes huge. Stop there try to ignore the conversation at that point. Things said in anger damages everything.

10. Me time. Me time is very important

This beautiful article is written by CA Ankita Gupta