POF : I got semi-catfished
I met someone about 4 weeks ago. We finally had the chance to meet in person yesterday. I really liked this guy. He has an attractive personality, but the photos he posted were about 4-5 years old. The only way i was able to tell they were his photos was because of the tatto on his arm he has. I am not physically attracted to him, and he is so into me. I’m not sure what to do.
Has anyone experienced this?
By. broken-heart12
Physical attraction is a must along with other factors.
You’re not going to have the desire/passion to be intimate with someone you’re not physically attracted to!
It’s clear he’s NOT the one, honey. No physical attraction now = revolting later. You don’t wanna barf on the dude mid-boink, do ya?
Move on and try again. You got this.
We all only present our best selves through our photos and bio on dating apps. I had braces a few years back and there are absolutely no photos of me from the 1.5 years I had them on, lol. In what way does he look different? If he has gained wait, it is likely due to stress, anxiety, etc. If that is the case, and it is such an issue for you, do the right thing and be honest and tell him you like his personality, but he presented himself in a dishonest way. It would make me wonder what else he is being dishonest about, but that’s just because I’m jaded after being lied to and jilted so many times.
My go to line is « was nice to meet you. I think you’re really nice but I don’t think we have any chemistry. Take care »
It’s to the point and a bit harsh but has always saved me more trouble
Tell him you enjoyed the conversations, but did not appreciate him leading you on to thinking he looked like his pictures, because he manipulated his narrative about himself and it completely turned you off.
“I’m sorry, I just don’t feel the connection. Best of luck!”
Literally this is it. Do not reply to further messages or any kind of guilt trip.
I literally just did this with a girl i met on bumble, she was really into me, not so much the other way. Yet i kept seeing them trying to look past physical attraction, it doesn’t work. Tell them how you feel immediately or block them.
the reply you give would probably be based on the dynamic so far.
if you guys were just casually talking then a casual no chemistry is more than ample. if you guys had a really close bond, a more fair reason would be nice, but not required.
just think of it from your view, if you had super good chemistry, you would probably want something more than a little vague line.
it’s tough though, because on the other hand, someone who falsely represents them self does not really deserve your decency either.
Ghost him