True love – Definitions360
Love is a strong, positive feeling of two people who love each other regardless of the situation or issues they are having.
There are different types of love: fraternal, religious, family love, etc. Their common point is the search for closeness. But none of them is true love.
To love is to know and accept your own qualities and faults, but also those of your partner. So, you have to know yourself to sincerely love another person.
See also the 10 most important human values
The subject of love is very often a source of controversial debates and polemics. There are many definitions of true love, they can be viewed positively or negatively. Besides, each person has their own idea of genuine love. The greatest writers, sages, philosophers, psychoanalysts have always tried to understand and define this enigma.
See also philosophy
True love, pure love or even genuine love that one can have for another is difficult to describe and explain. Why ? Because it is felt, it is experienced on a daily basis. This love brings well-being and joy. It helps to get to know each other better, to support and help their partner progress. It is a constructive feeling based on acceptance, trust, giving and real knowledge of one’s partner.
See also scientific knowledge
In true love there is no possession.
When the love for the other is pure and genuine, the urge to protect him, to meet his needs, to support him and to respect his freedom so that he can flourish will be instinctive. The relationship of the couple is healthy, because each one reveals himself and invests himself by giving the best of himself to his spouse. Lack of respect, emotional manipulation or even mistreatment cannot exist.
This healthy love allows everyone to go about their business without suffocating the other. There is a kind of independence.
See also human values
True love is different from passion.
Unlike true love, passion is love at first sight, a purely selfish feeling based on the fantasy of the other. He idealizes her and fuels possession and jealousy. Passionate love is fleeting love.
See also the need
True love is a constant fear of losing the other
Some people believe that pure love is a sign of addiction. They feel comfortable and feel independent in this solitude because, unconsciously, they are sheltered. They are therefore not vulnerable and cannot be hurt by each other.
According to The Love Cause by Monique Schneider, psychoanalyst and philosopher ̏True love is not a business contract: it is a violent feeling that puts both partners in danger. […]Love involves taking risks. It arouses a phenomenon of dizziness, sometimes even rejection: we can break love because we are too afraid of it, sabotage it while trying to confide, reduce its importance by focusing on an activity where everything rests on oneself. It all boils down to protecting ourselves from the exorbitant power of the other over us. […] When someone defends himself, she explains, that doesn’t mean he’s not in love. He may just be afraid of ending up with his hands tied. ̋
True love is to feel alive
Each moment shared will be lived in a more intense way. We feel freer, more beautiful,… we feel alive!
According to Jean-Paul Sartre, philosopher, The other is the embodied ideal, and we exist thanks to his gaze. To be loved is to feel justified to exist̋.
True love is not synonymous with perfection.
According to many thinkers, perfect love does not exist, but true love does. It is a love in which we give without waiting for a return. It is being built every day, with no planning, no deadline and no regulations.
See also the different figures of speech
True love is not immune to arguments or problems within the couple. But through communication, sharing and by knowing oneself and the other, the problem encountered will be more easily solved. The couple living a true love can feel weakened but remain united in the face of a situation which can be painful and complex. That is, the relationship will not be called into question because not only does strong love not fly away so easily, but through this daily mutual interaction, the difficulty analysis will be simplified.
See also the lotus flower
True love is not eternal.
This love can come to disappear if one of the parties concerned breaks the existing trust or because the partner evolves, in a general way, in a direction opposite to that of the spouse.
According to the American psychologist Robert Sternberg, professor at Yale University (Triangular Theory of Love, 1986), love accomplished, true is the right balance between 3 components: commitment, intimacy and passion .
- Thecommitment is the cognitive component. It is a long-term mutual partnership, building common projects.
- L‘privacy is the affective component. It is the emotional feeling that promotes trust and sharing.
- The passion is the mechanical component. It translates physical attraction and sexual desire.
These 3 elements can vary in intensity, the balance between them would be the accomplished love, the true and authentic love.
True Love, extract from the Little Prince by Saint Exupéry:
« – I love you, said the Little Prince
– I want you too, said the rose
– It’s not the same…, replied the Little Prince
… To want is to take possession of something, of someone.
It is to seek in others what can fulfill our personal needs for affection, companionship …
To want is to seek to make our own what does not belong to us, it is to appropriate or desire something to fulfill us, because at a given moment, something is missing.
To love is to desire the best for others, even if they have different aspirations from ours.
To love is to allow others to be happy, even if their path is different from mine.
It is a selfless feeling that arises from a gift of oneself, it is to give oneself entirely from our heart.
When we love, we give without asking for anything in return, for the simple and pure pleasure of giving.
But it is also certain that this gift, this gift of oneself, completely disinterested, only occurs when one knows.
We can only love what we know, because to love means to throw ourselves into the void, to trust in life and in the soul.
The soul cannot be bought or sold.
And to know is precisely to know everything about you, your joys, your peace, but also your annoyances, your struggles, your errors.
Because love transcends arguments, struggle and mistakes, love is not just for moments of joy.
To love is the absolute confidence that, whatever happens, you will always be there. Not because you owe me something, not out of selfish possession, but just to be there, in silent company.
To love is to know that the weather will not change anything, neither the storms nor the winters.
To love is to give others a place in my heart so that they may remain there as a father, a mother, a son, a friend, and to know that in their own heart, there is a place for me. .
Giving love does not empty love, on the contrary, it increases it.
The way to give so much love is to open your heart and let yourself be loved.
– I understood, said the rose
– Do not try to understand love, live it, said the Little Prince. «
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