Dating : The Date

Tonight i take my first steps into the world of dating
I am terrified of being that vulnerable to have to be engaging and interesting for an entire evening
My date is his gorgeous intelligent perfect specimen of a man
Whilst I’m a homely invisible ugly women with deep untreated psychological scars

I am going to have to face my deep seated perennial fear of being intimate
The fear of being in the outside having to interact with a stranger who I may become my future soul mate
The fear the anxiety is palpable in my neurotic body as i prepare myself for a evening of possibilities
Will may date be overcome with boredom will we connect

I fear him finding me repulsive but also being put off by my introverted social awkward personality
I’m dreading having these staid monosyllabic conversations having no witty or interesting to verbalise with my perfect date
I dread suffering another panic attack in the midst of a date

I have dreamed of meeting a man such as this a Prince Charming who will beguile with his ebullient personality
I have fantasised of falling in love of another soul being entranced by my physical presence
Tonight I want these fantastical dreams to be actualised
I want to conquer my demons my self loathing my crippling social anxiety and fall in love with a luscious figure of masculine perfection