Dating : Love is A Gamble

I have 2 favorite lines about love. “Love comes to those who believe it” and “Love is a gamble”. Because even though you had the worst experience in love before, you still have to bet on it when it comes, invest your time and emotions, and wish that you hit a jackpot at the end of it all. May it be with a new person or trying out a second chance with an old flame.

In 2013, I was in a relationship with this man for 4…months. Until the universe has spoken that it was not the best time and we had to break apart. It was the most shattering experience. The worst among all the other heartbreaks that I’ve experienced. I went through the stages of moving on. I was listening to sad music, crying wherever I am — on the bus, on the company shuttle, on my desk, in the restroom, at a restaurant, you name it. I even published a blog about the break-up. All of these happening while we are in close vicinity with each other in our office.

Gladly, by the end of 2013, I got over it. I prayed to God and said, “I want to okay. I don’t want to be sad anymore and I’m tired of crying. If we’re really meant to be together, you’ll find a way. If not, please let me be okay.”

God answered my prayer. 2014 is going well. But the ex is also back in the picture.

He wants to play a wild card in my life. He started sending me emails again, writing letters, apologizing, surprising me with my favorite Red Velvet cupcakes, treating me out to dinner. It confused me. Did I really moved on or was the feeling just there. Hidden until he comes back to me.

In Christina Aguilera’s song “What A Girl Wants”, she said that “if you love something let it go. If it comes back it’s yours…” That’s a sign, I said. I hear different opinions and some unsolicited pieces of advice. But one of my closest friends said this, “We’ll be happy for you whatever your decision is”. After a few months of consideration, I made the decision to give him a second chance.

From then up to this moment, I’m thankful that I took that risk. Because if not, I wouldn’t know what unconditional love is. I wouldn’t learn that I can love a “man with a few words”, to appreciate actions more than words. I wouldn’t see how chivalrous he is. I wouldn’t dare stretch my outdoor adventure limit if it’s not because of his influence. I wouldn’t realize how patient he is with almost all sorts of matter. I wouldn’t know that although we have different interests, our similar points of view in life balances that. I realized how we complement each other despite our opposites.

I discovered all of these because I took a gamble.

In life and in love, you’ll never know what your fate is unless you take risks. It might work and it might not but it’s better to find out than ask “what ifs” in the future. Love is really a gamble. So drop your fears, close your eyes and roll those dice.