Dating : Blink, Gone.

Dear diary,

Saw one of my best friends from high school two weekends ago. Went drinking and chilling on the mountain top. She brought her speaker. Which I thought was genius. You never can count on me for that kind of stuff. I can be a pretty lazy bastard. The temperature was spot on too, and our friendship hadn’t changed. That’s the fun part about real friendships. They’re pillars.

Oh yeah. Learned that one of our friends passed-away last year. Last saw her when I was 16 or something. Honestly, at first, I was kinda pissed-off that nobody had told me anything… But I get it… Only stayed two years at this crummy private school (yes, private schools can be quite crummy if you ask me. You get at least one grey frizzy hair every two days or so on your cafeteria food. Yikes.) Anyhow, then left for New York and stuff so kinda lost touch with everybody for a while. Got off from Facebook a bunch of times too… I can be quite savage.

For instance, while working in the athletes lounges at this tennis tournament I was at for the past week and a half, told some guy who was giving me shit for being a diva: ‘‘ You shouldn’t frown so much when you’re pissed-off, it’s really not attractive.’’ He sure left me alone after that. What a clown… It’s a real jungle out-there, might as well be the fucking lion. Else be prepared to be a carpet. I don’t know where I was going with this anyway… Oh yeah! Just that, that’s the kind of savage bitch I am.

Hey! The coach of Khachanov came up to me and gave me his ball! From practice. His tennis ball I mean. Just for the hell of it. That made my day. It’s right next to me on my computer desk right now. I’m debating if I should sell it on Kijiji as Khachanov practice ball. The only problem with this is it’s not signed. So nobody would believe me. Nobody ever believes me truly anyway…

I feel like your head would spin if you saw the state of my pink Ikea desk right now. There’s a lot of shit chilling there. I don’t plan to do anything about it though. Enjoy living in chaos, it’s all I know. Anyway, was kind of in a PMS mood when I met this new buddy, but his ball really made me smile. We bonded a bit and because of him, this bitch is off to The US Open next week! Boy am I excited. YOLO. Guess I won’t have a choice but to watch Breakfast At Tiffany’s before my trip… Hope you didn’t forget about me New York City!

Oh and no worries, this dude knows I’m a proud Born Again Virgin. Told him I would bring my pepper spray with me as well. Thrilling. Also, my new friend sent me videos of where he was at in the stadium last year… Almost passed-out. No kidding. This lucky bastard was on the court. Literally. Best seats in the house! Pretty glamorous shit ahead. Wouldn’t be surprised if I’m sitting next to Kanye West or Beyoncé, or Gwen Stefani (even better).

Back to this dead girl. Can’t believe it. It’s the first time that someone my age, that I chilled with, dies. Was there on my sweet sixteen. There when outside of the restaurant, under the neon lights of this gas station, we, a pack of about 10 loud bitches (drunk off Piña Colada), noticed a couple getting the time against their window’s apartment. Fairly babies, we all thought it was HiLaRiOuS… I don’t think we were getting the time much back then. Anyway. She was one of the bitches. The worst part is her Facebook account is still on and stuff. Like nothing happened. A Facebook ghost. I hate that. Couldn’t tell you why… But I just hate it.

We’ll call her Audrey. Not my grandma Audrey, another Audrey. It’s a swell name and I can’t think of anything else at the moment. Anyhow, Audrey was always herself. She had a wisdom and a natural grace about her… For her age I mean. Nobody fucked with Audrey. That gal knew better. Sometimes, she would arrive in class, hair greasy as can be, no makeup (still pretty), shirt untucked from her pants (had to tuck it in normally, it was one of the rules of this crummy private school). Bold. All students wore the same shit everyday, kinda like SpongeBob… Her balls made her stand out. Audrey was real before any of us were. And that’s just the truth.

Stuff surrounding her death kinda disturbed me though. Not that I felt anything about it… Don’t really feel genuine emotions too much. Except when I’m wasted. When I’m drunk or high, I’m able to cry for a few minutes. Otherwise, when I cry, it’s rage. Still counts? I’ve tried to shed a tear for Audrey being gone and all… Got a fart. No. I’m kidding. There was some salty discharge in my right eye for a while. It’s something.

Audrey was an artist, painted and stuff… Apparently, before leaving Earth, she chose for a school project to ask people that knew her what would they say if she’d died… And then, she died… On a motorcycle. While on vacation. Wonder if she was wearing a helmet. I would really like to know, to tell you the truth. In my diary, helmets are mandatory. I don’t care if we hate each other’s guts. Wear a helmet for christ’s sake. Anyhow, that’s about it from the echo I’ve gotten.

It’s not like I didn’t asked my friend a bunch of questions… But in life, you only get few answers. It sucks. Buddies get tired of all my questions sometimes… You need to stop me. No kidding. I can annoy the hell out of you with them. It’s a skill.

Anyway, won’t forget this girl. Her kindness of heart, fearless wit and lucidity were qualities that made her something out of the extraordinary. The kind of fairytale princess you want your kids to read about. Will grind harder, that’s how I’m going to remember her. I know Audrey is chilling right now, on cloud9. Having a blast, and digging her new role as an angel.