Dating : Do You Have An Anxious Attachment Style in Relationships?

You may feel on your toes that the person you’re with will end things — and you’re likely on high alert for shifts in their behaviours.

Your anxious attachment may get activated when you:

• Feel the other person is losing interest (whether real or imagined)
• Feel they’re not giving you enough love or affection because they’re working a lot, or seeing friends more often
• Notice a change in the other person’s mood

You might believe you aren’t good enough for your partner deep down, or think they’ll leave you for someone ‘better.’

I felt this way with everyone I dated, and it was a self-fulfilling prophecy that sabotaged my relationships.

Just because your brain tells you it’s a threat, it may not be as bad as you think… Try investigating instead.

What to Do

• Communicate — Before jumping to conclusions, try opening the lines of communication between the two of you. The person you’re with may have had a tough day at work, you can’t read their mind, try asking instead.
• Mindfulness — Mindfulness (and meditation) can help reduce anxiety and bring us into the present moment again. Observe 3 things you can hear, see, smell or touch. The more you practice, the better you’ll get.