Dating : Emotions run high

Emotions run high

Can’t tell what these are

I don’t belong in this world

Haven’t done anything in my life

I used to know these thoughts

I used to know myself

As I sit here

As I lay here

I don’t want to be here

I feel too far gone

It’s like I’m not worthy

I love around me

But today I hate me

I hate my face

I hate the way I did my hair

I hate my chubby cheeks

I hate my little eyes

I hate my body

I can’t even feel indifferent today

I’m nothing special

I try so hard to be happy for love

But I’m so tired of crying

I loathe everything about me

Inside and out

I feel crazy

I feel so tired of being here

I used to know my own thoughts

But now…

I don’t know anything

Or so it feels

They say I’m beautiful

They say I’m loved

But I can’t stop hurting myself

It’s all I think about

But I feel like a mess

I hate my mind

The way I think

The woman in the mirror

I live life through a lens

Not even my own eyes

All I can do is break down

All I want to do is scream out

I hate who I’m becoming

But I don’t know how to change

I don’t understand myself

I try to understand everyone around me

It feels like it’s easier to know them

Instead of feeling the hate for myself

I’m looking through a darkened lens

It feels like I’ll never change

No matter how hard I try

Who am I supposed to be?

Who will I be tomorrow?

Will they still love me the same?