Dating : How To Win Her Heart When You’re Death

Advice from Death’s Life Coach

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before…

You’ve hit it off with a cute mortal, trading quips over Tinder. But when you finally meet for drinks, she gets one look at your scythe and flees in panic.

We’ve all been there.

I call this the “I Don’t Date Death” dealbreaker. And many humans have it.

But today, I’m here to comfort you.

Even Grim Reapers can find love with the right attitude.

Just follow my helpful tips:

1) Change your cloak!

Many reapers have sentimental attachments to their classic black cloak, but this outfit has carried strong “death” vibes for centuries.

Meanwhile, there’s a whole spectrum of color awaiting you. On your next date, try the yellow cloak with stripes! And isn’t it about time you broke out that Christmas scarf?

Your hip, new style will distract from your sickly skeletal form!

2) Quit working on your date!

I know it’s convenient to schedule your romantic walk in the park so you can easily reap Joe on his family picnic, but this is just bad etiquette!

Save your reapings for work hours, please!

3) Reword your dating profile!

God help me if I see another profile that starts: “So, I know it seems scary but I’m actually a grim reaper, but I’m not looking to take your soul or anything…”

Be playful about your job!

One of my clients has a go-to: “When people find out, I have to kill them :)”

He’s been married five years now.

I hope this advice proves helpful. Remember, there’s many fish in the sea. And some of those fish date grim reapers!