Dating : I Surrendered to the Virus and This is What Happened

This is what happens when I go inside. I feel I am called to surrender to something that is bigger than me. In fact, to nature itself. The virus is bigger than us humans, although we take the necessary measures to control it.

The coronavirus is a huge mirror for us on a level of society, and I guess it is even a much bigger mirror for us on a personal level.

What have you been through the last several days? Has it been a rollercoaster ride like it has been for me?

Panic, fear, despair, hope, compassion, again fear, anger, control, trust, and… could you finally surrender beyond following social media and the news?

The rule is clear in Spain where I live: we have four weeks of home quarantine. This structure actually brings clarity, a collective agreement that is easy to understand.

It has prevented more chaos and toilet paper insanity.

I am Dutch, and Holland is doing something else. A lot of gatherings are suspended, but people can be outside in a park for example or going to work in certain sectors. Holland, like the UK and the US, is going for herd immunity. It is just another approach, we all don’t really know what will work. Nobody has any clue how many younger people will die of this. Every day young people die of all kinds of horrible things like lack of food, clean water or being unlucky to grow up in a war zone.

Again, it is surrender to nature, to something bigger than all of us. We are not so much used to this in our western culture. But it feels like the wisest thing to do now. Also to surrender to the measures that have been taken by nations.

What happens when you really surrender deep inside is this: You don’t fight it any longer. From that space, awareness can arise that there is something bigger here at play. There are many theories, and most of them envision a very challenging period of more disruption and collapse; a time of purification and collective purging to stand up as new humanity with a higher vibration in tune with our mother earth.

Let’s take it day by day, shall we?

You know what? I haven’t a clue like most people. And that feels fine. No, it feels like salvation.

Surrendering feels like the big bow to nature that seems like the only appropriate thing to do.

And surrendering to all the circumstances that come with it: house quarantine, having not that much gas left to cook, insecurity about my income on the short and long term, not being able to see friends for a while, and the knowledge that I will probably get the virus in the (near) future… and how would that feel? Would I survive?

In that deeper true space of surrender, this doesn’t even matter. It is my mind posing all these questions since there is suddenly so much insecurity around me, but to truly surrender to all of it brings me to be humble for this great amazing big life, this huge gift. All of this disaster sparks gratitude like never before.

In the face of death and disaster, it feels great to be alive. I am humbled to my knees to hear the birds sing outside my window. I am alive, you are alive.

For now, that is enough.

Lucien Lecarme