Dating : I Want To Buy Him Nikes

My gift giving troubles as an unemployed 19 year old and how I solved this problem.

Hi, I’m 19 and I have a 20 year old boyfriend whom I absolutely adore. I want to buy him gifts and not just on special days. I want to buy him perfume, nice shirts and maybe on a really good day, a dope pair of Nike shoes or those weird coloured football boots he seems to love. However, my major source of income also happens to be the monthly allowance my mom gives me for I and my siblings. So technically, there isn’t a lot to spare. My mom is somewhat supportive of the relationship and she does understand when I need a little extra for this purpose and she can be really helpful but trust me when I say it is a very annoying thing to have to do especially at this age when you seriously want to start out on your own and think you have something to prove to the world.

So you are probably thinking well….get a job! Yeah….about that. I also happen to come from a country where half the population is unemployed and consequently, getting a job isn’t a walk in the park. I mean I watch Tv and see all those 16 year olds working in yoghurt shops and at stores but even a lot of full grown adults here with families to take care of don’t have that luxury. So my case is a rather sorry one. Or maybe it isn’t.

While I was feeling very frustrated because another holiday just happens to be around the corner, I took a little while to think about it and afterwards I wrote a little note to myself on how to make the best of my situation. It might be a tad-bit helpful if you find yourself in a similar dilemma.

I understand the importance of gifts in a relationship but maybe I’m living a little above my means. Gifts do not have to cost you a fortune. What matters is that they are thoughtful and from the heart. So save a small amount, there must be some other things he’d appreciate. Buy him a nice shirt; mine loves Raglans or checkered shirts. Trust me, he’d love them just as much and be much happier when he knows you didn’t starve yourself.

Do nice favours for him, assist with certain tasks. He and I are both in college, so I’d say proofread an assignment for him or buy him donuts or sausage rolls from that shop he loves but can only visit once in a while. Buy him a new wallet if you notice his is getting a bit old unless he has sentimental attachments to it of course. If anything, It’d show you are actually paying attention. Guys tend to not pay attention to stuff like this so he’d be thankful. Definitely more thoughtful than buying him those Nikes he’s constantly talking about.

If you are having sex, new underwear for yourself in his favourite colour on you might just be it! You do not have to buy an actual present all the time when you can be one yourself wrapped up in wrapping paper he’d definitely want to rip off you. Or wear that dress he says he’s been wanting to take off you. Works either way if you ask me.

And no, I’m not encouraging you to be a cheapskate girlfriend. Absolutely not. You’d only be a cheapskate if you are not spending money you obviously have and which in this case, you obviously don’t. And he is probably all too aware of that fact so he would most likely appreciate almost anything if he knows that you might have had to deprive yourself of some stuff or healthily cut down on your spending just to get that gift. Bear in mind that gifts don’t necessarily have to be money-intensive. Time, creativity and thoughtfulness are valuable assets too and they count a whole lot.

Finally, do not give up on your dreams of buying him more expensive stuff. You might just need to save for much longer or wait till you get a job which would enable you afford them eventually without losing all the weight in the world in the process. If you are saving up to buy something really nice and expensive for him in future or thinking of doing so when you finally secure paid employment, you are probably thinking long term and obviously want to have him in your life in the nearest future and that’s a good thing. If he does love you and wants to be in your life a while, he’d appreciate those things when you are finally able to give them to him.