Dating : Men can and should do better

I’m sick of knowing 10 high-quality single women for every 1 high-quality single man.

Women, who take care of their mind, body, and soul, who are financially independent and motivated in their careers, intelligent, beautiful, who are strong and resilient after being through hell and back, but don’t carry resentfulness and still find a way to exude the utmost kindness and generosity. Who are capable of loving like they’ve never been hurt, even though they’ve been hurt more times than they can count.

I’m sick of women feeling bad for knowing what they want and and feeling bad for it because so many men are — and may not ever be — ready or capable of growing up.

I’m sick of women talking amongst themselves about how they can strengthen their relationships and be better partners, while their male partners sit around talking about sports, playing video games, or tossing back beers, all while barely even thinking of their partners.

I’m sick of women going to therapy and working on themselves, being so wonderfully open to being challenged and exploring the “why” of their thoughts, emotions, and feelings, while men refuse to be emotionally vulnerable with anybody, let alone a therapist; who instead suppress their difficult feelings and let them manifest as anger, addiction, or even just as being closed off and distant while their partners strategize on ways they can find reconnection.

I’m sick of knowing so many women who are more loving, giving, and open than their partners who don’t give it in return. I’m sick of how we feel bad about ourselves when men make us feel like we’re asking them for too much, because frankly we’re not asking for enough. In most cases women know they deserve better, but think of the men they’ve dated, that they know, or that their girlfriends’ are with, and have to acknowledge that the only options are to settle for what we can get or choose to be alone. The odds are against us.

I’m sick of men not being better on the whole. Of cheating, emotionally or physically. Of being manipulative and abusive. Of expecting women to both contribute financially and be “modern” working women while still being the one primarily responsible in traditional tasks like cleaning and parenting. Of having you expect us to give you what your mom gave you; to nurture you, feed you, and comfort you. Of having to be a lady in the streets but a freak in the bed.

Of not even coming relatively close to the high bar that women set. I’m sick of how many of them get away with their childish ways into their 30s, 40s, and beyond; who stubbornly refuse to change or challenge themselves on how they can be better human beings.

I’m sick of having to consider that my standards are too high. I have a lot to give, and I only look for things in a partner that I’m capable of giving to him.

Men can and should do better.