Dating : Mr. Poet

He went to grad school in College Station and immediately got a job in Houston. He was the sheer pride and joy of his parents. Doing everything that he could to follow the trail that they paved for him. He was an engineer.

But in the deepest crevices of his heart, he was a poet.

We chatted for awhile before he asked me out on a date.

He showed me a lot of poems. I think I had put that I enjoyed poetry in my profile. And I did.

I never showed him my poetry, but he showed me his. And he was willing to hear critique about it and answers the questions I had.

After a couple of weeks of chatting, he asked me out for tea.

He picked me up after work. The first thing I noticed was that he catfished me. I mean, he used pictures from 4–5 years ago. He didn’t look too different. But he looked older….and balder.

I decided to take him to Teahouse for some local boba tea.

We went inside and there were teenagers everywhere. There was a local high school close by and this is their hangout before their parents picked them up.

We squeezed by some teenagers and ordered boba.

I ordered Taro, which he had never heard of. I let him try it and he was utterly disgusted.

We had a good conversation and talked about his immigrant story. His parents were visiting him, currently.

After having tea and snacks, he took me home.

Before I got out of the car, he kissed me and started getting physically aggressive and wanted to touch different parts of my body. I said no. And left the car confused.

What happened to the sensitive poet??

After the date: After the date, he would text me, but I was so turned off by how aggressive he became.

I asked him where it came from and he simply said he was attracted to me and wanted to touch me.

He would text me poems here and there, but there was nothing that came out of it.

He added me on Instagram recently and would say hi sporadically.

Lessons learned:

1. Even the nice and sensitive guys have agendas. And when they do, it’s a bigger betrayal. At least when douche bags are up front, they are honest. But when they have the mask of the sensitive guy and take off that mask, it’s confusing. The turn of events was so strange to me. And it was weird that this was the climax within one date. There was nothing in his texts or on our date that hinted at ramping up anything sexual. There were no sexual innuendos or sexual jokes. It was two people having a nice time talking and getting to know each other. We were not on the same page and didn’t want the same things.
2. Do not trust anyone who is catfishing you. I’m sure this goes without saying. The catfish may be subtle, but the foundation of your interactions are already based on lies when the photographs they send you are from 4–5 years ago. So when you meet and you realize that they gave you old photos, THIS IS A RED FLAG. Obviously, they’re masking or are not confident in the skin that they are in.
3. Do not trust anyone that doesn’t like taro. As a Filipina, I was a offended.