Dating : No. Actually the thought of “body count” is alive and thriving, probably more prevalent today than…

No. Actually the thought of “body count” is alive and thriving, probably more prevalent today than in the time of your dating life.

There’s this saying today: “women want a man with a promising future. Men want a woman without a past.”

This idea reflects that men see women with a hypergamous nature to always “date up” — looking for the better deal. If she has had multiple partners, then the belief is she could never truly bond with her “one and only” regardless because she’ll always have a comparison and a delusion that she has many options.

Now as silly as expecting women not to have a past sounds, it is more figurative than literal. “Past” in this quote represents sexual past only. That’s it. Not how many guys she’s been on coffee or dinner dates with, but just the men she has invited to her private estate numerously.

Talking or even not talking about your partners sexual history needs to be approached with caution regardless. If a woman never talks about it, but her man discovers, accidentally or intentionally, some unsettling truth about how she got around, it’s going to shake their relationship to the core.

He’ll then never feel like he’s enough or she’ll eventually step out because she has had (or there is) something better supposedly.

Also, if your main squeeze finds out you did “favors” for men who didn’t churn much effort while you make him jump over hurdles for oral sex or lie expressing, “I don’t do those types of things,” or “I’m not that type of girl” (but you really were), then kiss your potential marriage partner good bye.

I personally agree with you that a woman’s sexual history shouldn’t matter if you’re with the one you truly care about. However, it still does with us men. In my own marriage, I had to work through some personal feelings about my wife’s “past” which took time.

PS: I’m a fan of your work. I loved your novel “Platinum.” I’m following this publication because of your writing ha ha. You should also look into what’s called the “negromanosphere” which I think will give you a wealth of relationship material to talk about.