Dating : Sex On The First Date?

When it comes to buyer’s remorse, I am a firm believer in the concept of trying before you buy. As such, I have slept with most of my boyfriends before our third date.

Why?

I love sex.

Sex is a major aspect of any relationship I am in. I know exactly what I seek in a relationship and sexual partner. The way I see it, you wouldn’t blindly invest in the stock market without doing research. Therefore, I do not invest in a partner before conducting my own thorough investigation.

Yet, despite the valuable knowledge this research divulges, there is still a taboo about having sex early on in a relationship.

I don’t understand it. Why wait? I would hate to date a man for 6 months, only to find out he prefers one sex position, has 3 inches, and comes in 47 seconds. A 6-month situation that could have been avoided if we played hide the sausage on the first date.

You may be reading this and pondering, is this still an issue?

Yes. Whilst the stigma surrounding first date sex has lessened over the years, the Morality Police are still around! These self-appointed officers are quick to inform you that no guy wants a relationship with an “easy” girl. Their eyes narrowed with judgment as they glance at the condoms in your purse.

These officers no longer faze me, but when I was younger, I felt judged and dirty for my sexual appetite. As though I was somehow approaching this whole “relationship” thing wrong. This judgment is echoed amongst friends, colleagues, magazines, the internet, and social culture.

Of course, I’ve since come to realize that there is no “right way” when it comes to relationships. You just have to figure out what works for you. At present, I am entirely in tune with my sexuality. I am confident in my appearance, my desires, and how I want to be treated both inside and out of the bedroom.

I managed to conclude my approach to sex and dating was perfect for me through years of long, hard detailed investigation. From my perspective, sexual fetishes, desires, and frequency tend not to change dramatically over the years. Insight often gleaned during the initial sexual rendezvous.

If a guy is not comfortable with exhibitionism and has a very low sex drive, it is highly unlikely he’ll join me at a swingers party after a marathon sex week.

I love rough sex, and being called a slut as a guy dominates me. If you aren’t dominant and you feel distressed about using such language, then it’s not going to work between us. I place too high of a value on sex to be with someone who won’t satisfy my needs. Similarly, I would not want to be with a guy who I couldn’t please sexually. Life is way too short to be sexually frustrated.

Plus, this goes both ways. I’ve had a few guys not want to be with me due to their sexual penchants. One guy did not want a relationship with me as I dislike anal sex. Another preferred a woman who kept downstairs completely bare, and another guy wanted someone with bigger boobs.

Was I mad? No. There are over 7 billion people in the world. Why waste emotions on a guy who doesn’t want a woman with an enviable forest? I do not want a partner who tells me to shave. If a full bloom turns you off, that’s ok. I’m not so vain as to think every man would like my body type, shape, and attributes. I just prefer to find this out at the beginning of a relationship.

Ultimately, my decision to have sex on the first or second date has served me well over the years. I have had fantastic loving boyfriends throughout the years, who were on the same sexual wavelength. So have sex on the first date if that works for you. Whatever you choose to do, be confident and unapologetic in your choice.