Dating : Support Behind Rectangles!

And after 5 complete months of isolation, I have opened my text editor today to write something. It’s a strange feeling. A feeling that is telling me to stop right now and procrastinate and think about all the insecurities and self-doubts and all the terrible things that have happened in the last 8 months. The inertia is pretty high. I think they call it the writer’s block or something but I know this feeling. It has made its home in a part of me but today, I am not alone in this. The person behind this rectangular screen is not my doctor, not the person to whom I’ve opened up before who have judged me, not the person I thought I’d be spending the rest of my life with, and definitely not someone I’ve been sharing relations since childhood. Yet she is one of the most amazing people I’ve ever got a chance to talk, she is Dawn Kuenzi, my mentor and the one who has motivated me the most to get back on track and get my shit together!

This article is dedicated to all my(and your) similar supports behind these rectangles!

I have always been very open about my life because even though it wasn’t all pretty, it was pretty classic and I’ve been super proud of it. I still am but sometimes things you’ve never seen coming happens and everything changes.

In reality, we do have very little control over what is happening to us. Sometimes it’s something impending because of our previous choices and sometimes we just got unlucky! Either way, we do have a choice of controlling our emotions and perspective towards it.

It’s super easier said than done and there’s no easy way out.

But once you realize that everyone is struggling their own battles and the world doesn’t owe you something even if you’ve done everything right with all the hard work of this world, it just becomes easy to live with it.

There’s no way of going beneath or above it, we have to go through it to let it go!

Because whatever happens, has to happen and there’s always a silver lining to it but you cannot find the silver lining looking forward, you can only find it looking backward so you have to be hopeful and trust in your gut, luck, hard work, or anything that you believe in that you’ll be able to find your blessings in disguise sooner or later!

Every rejection is protection from a future you’re not supposed to live. Every betrayal is a reminder that you’re capable of carrying yourself from the worst of your times all by yourself and every bad time comes with freedom.

Freedom to hate the people who’ve put you in the situation or freedom to wish them the best for their lives, send them love, and let it go!

Because karma is a bitch, only if you are 🙂

Make peace with the fact that you’re a human being. You may have made mistakes. You might have been a part of wrong choices but your intentions were never wrong and all this is an experience to help you define the kind of person you really want to be.

And in the process, especially at these hard times, thank each of your support behind these rectangles. Be the support you’re seeking outside to someone. Appreciate people. Tell them they’re doing great and you’re super proud of them and that’s how it will be a better and happier place to live, even at the worst of your times!

I am extremely grateful for the support I’ve received from Dawn, my roommates, my best friend, my google mentors and peers, my new friends, and the people I’ve connected and reconnected with during this time. Thank you for everything!

And in the end, as explained by Elizabeth Gilbert in the Physics of the quest,

“If you are brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting (which can be anything from your house to your bitter old resentments) and set out on a truth-seeking journey (either externally or internally), and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue, and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher, and if you are prepared — most of all — to face (and forgive) some very difficult realities about yourself… then truth will not be withheld from you and you can achieve anything to everything in your life”

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk!

Love, Anjali ❤