Dating : The Art of Solo Dating

As an extreme extrovert who has gotten burnt out by the stale and cyclical nature of online dating, I started solo dating almost by accident.

To balance out the exhaustion of constantly socializing and making small talk with strangers, I began treating myself to a detox session for every date I went on. Most recently, I spent a productive Sunday taking a dance class, going to the Korean spa, getting a massage, and cooking a nice dinner at home.

Needless to say, it was one of the best days ever.

Now, looking back at those two scenarios I outlined above, it’s pretty clear the second one sounds 10 times better, even if the last sentence (re: eating alone at a fancy restaurant) is a bit daunting.

Think about it. If your date ends up being a catfish, an asshole, or a complete dud, you’re basically stuck spending the next hour picking at the subpar salad you begrudgingly ordered, pretending to be impressed by this dude’s cryptomancing (apparently it’s a thing), and feigning mild interest in his *exciting* past life as a hotshot frat star.

Instead of enduring all this BS, you could’ve just been here alone, treating yourself to some Pinot Noir and digging into the flanked spare ribs that you actually wanted to try.

Don’t get me wrong. Most of the dates I’ve been on have actually been pretty decent. Guys are polite, they put in effort, it’s a pleasant time for the most part. But what’s the problem with checking out these cool restaurants and bars out by yourself, for a change?

I’m not saying you should stop dating altogether, but maybe the next time after you come home from a humdrum first date, think about restoring your faith in romance with a little self-lovin’ instead.

To get you started, here are some ideas for solo dates:

1. Watch a matinee movie or show.

2. Eat at a fancy restaurant.

3. Go to an outdoor concert or festival.

4. Check out an art gallery.

5. Pack a picnic & a book for the beach.

6. Catch a sunrise/sunset.

7. Attend a Comedy Club or Improv show.

9. Go climbing/bouldering.

10. Plan a day trip to a nearby national park.

At the end of the day, solo dating is synonymous with self-care. Take care of yourself, and you might even become a better date to others 😉