Dating : Try these stupidly simple things for a positive dating experience

Congratulations! You got a date. Whether you were asked out or did the asking, it doesn’t matter. You’re in for an adventure, and hopefully, it will be a good one.

Even if they aren’t the one, there’s no reason you can’t have a good time. Or be friends without romance. We can all use more friends.

If you set out with the goal of treating this stranger as a friend, chances are you’ll have a good time. Unless of course, you’re a lousy friend. But let’s assume you’re not.

Dating is more casual these days, but being casual doesn’t mean being rude or inconsiderate. Opening doors and pulling out chairs for a woman are a good start, especially during first dates. And women need to be sensitive as well to her date’s feelings.

There are rules of common courtesy and engagement that can make a date more pleasant, even when it’s precisely not what you were hoping for.

See if you agree.

It’s difficult to have a good time if one person is doing something they don’t like, or pretending they like something they don’t.

Be aware of your date’s demeanor. It’s pretty obvious when someone is trying to be a good sport but is downright miserable. And if you already know they don’t like the activity, do something else.

Dates are supposed to be two-sided.

If you disagree, maybe you should go out by yourself.

Even it’s semi-casual, you want to look your best, and that means putting some thought into what you’re going to wear.

Take into consideration where you’re going and dress for the place, the person, as well as the event. Make sure your clothes are clean and neat, and yes, iron them if necessary.

Pick out clothes that you feel comfortable in. New clothes sometimes are the best way to go, but not necessarily.

Don’t wear sloppy, casual clothes you’d wear on a night out with your friends to a bar. This is a date, and dressing down is a sign that you don’t care. Hopefully, your date will reciprocate, but even if they don’t, you’ve started on the right foot.

It’s not nice to keep someone waiting, and if you’re more than five minutes late, well, you’re late.

If something has been planned, such as dinner reservations, you need to be on time. After 10 minutes your reservations might be gone.

Make every effort to arrive on time. Leave early if you know there’s going to be in traffic or encounter some delay. A good rule of thumb is to give yourself an extra 15-minutes, in my opinion anyway.

If you’re going to be late, contact your date. Being late is not a good way to start, but at least you won’t keep them hanging.

Once you’ve met up with your date, put your phone face down on the table and ignore it unless you’re expecting an urgent call or suspect there’s an emergency.

Don’t check and respond to social media. A person is sitting in front of you and they take precedence. You’re supposed to be social with them, not your thousands of unknown Facebook friends.

Looking at and checking your phone is a rude, but an incredibly common, habit.

Be honest with your date about what you’re looking for, even if it’s a fling.

Lying isn’t fair, and it sets expectations you may have no intention of meeting. You don’t have to be brutally frank or offer information you haven’t been asked.

But you can’t have any a relationship when you lie, never mind a romance.

So be as honest as you can.

Talking About Yourself

You hear about this a lot. You go on a date, and it’s all about them. Unless you are the most exciting person in the world, your date might look for an exit sign.

So unless you want to be left staring at an empty seat, make it a two-way conversation and not a diatribe of your life with all its trials, tribulations, accomplishments, and relationships.

Give a little information. Ask some questions, then listen.

Interrogating Your Date

And then some dates make you feel like a witness at a murder trial.

Yes, you want to get to know this person better, but throwing one question after another at them is not the way to go.

There might be information your date doesn’t want to share at this point. So keep it light, take a deep breath, and give the other person a chance to ask you a few questions.

Being Negative

Talking about the unseasonably hot, cold, wet, or whatever weather isn’t necessarily the worst thing. Especially if you can’t think of something pleasant to say.

The world is a tough place, and you don’t need to be reminded of it. Your date should take you away from that reality for a couple of hours. And you should respond likewise.

As someone who tells it like it is, I tend to tell it all. And people don’t want to know everything. Thankfully my family and friends have stayed with me on this one, and they stop me when I begin a rant. Through practice, I’ve learned to stop myself and focus on things that have a positive slant.

Do likewise. And practice if you need to.

It helps.

Not Talking at All

You ask a question and get a one-word answer. This continues.

A date in silence is a date in hell. If you’re not good at the art of conversation, read something, say about traveling, or something you like to do, so you have something to say.

Practice with a friend if need be. But if you honestly can’t hold a conversation, dating is going to be a miserable experience.

For both people.

Whether it’s on the road, at the movies, or in a restaurant, it’s embarrassing when your date is rude to someone — or embarrassing to your date if you are.

This is one of those behaviors that you want to reel in. Count to ten before you reply. Take a deep breath.

If you’re rude, it may very well be your last date with this person,

which might not be a bad thing. But rudeness is a bad habit.

There are too many uncomfortable topics to list, but politics, sex, and talking about your ex or divorce are a few that come to mind.

You know the expression, too much, too soon. You’re getting to know one another, so start slowly. As time goes on, you’ll get to the big heavy stuff.

But for now, it can wait.

You might want one or two to relax, but you don’t want to get to the point you’re out of control.

It’s not attractive.

Enough said.