POF : Anyone else having trouble with men not wanting to meet in pilublic?
We’re always told of ways to keep safe as women, and one of the big ones is to always meet in public. But just about every man I talk to is reluctant to do that. They all ask why I don’t trust them, and what about them has made me suspicious of them. They want to come to my place, or me go to their place. I know they are hoping for sex, but meeting in public doesn’t necessarily mean that’s off the table.
Is anyone else having this problem? I can count on one hand the number of people who have not argued about this.
Any men on here want to explain to me why I get a guilt trip because I want to feel safe?
By. FlossieTheWonderDog
As a male – there are many reasons why I WANT to meet in public – there are many « cray-cray » types on both sides..
They don’t want to be seen in public with you.
Don’t feel guilty because you want to feel safe. It’s a dangerous world we live in, and I’m a girl, and I can tell you I always tell no go guys who want to meet at their place, and not meet in public. I used to also write in my profile that I’d like to meet at a public place, and I haven’t had people ask me over to their place since I’ve done that. Now guys are like “so where do you want to meet at?.” Don’t feel ashamed for wanting to be safe trust me I don’t. I’ve been getting a lot more quality guys as well putting that on my profile.
Sleazy guys will always exist I just set them right and let them know what I’m looking for. Best of luck:)
As a man, I always try to set up dates in public, first dates are preferably lunch, during the day, obviously. Separate vehicles, meeting there, safe calls are okay, too. I wouldn’t begrudge a woman if she made a call to someone mid-date to let them know she was safe.
I always meet in a public place. If they’re not comfortable with that then obviously, they may not have the best intentions. I always carry cash enough to cover my food and a tip. Because if it doesn’t work out or it’s awkward I don’t want them to feel like I use them for a free meal. If they won’t except me paying for my food I’ll do the tip. That’s my standard go to.
As a dude who works in the computer security field, I encourage women to be as cautious as possible. Personally I offer to give any woman who I have a date planned with whatever info she wants so she can run a background check on me or whatever she needs to feel comfortable. I have only had one or two take me up on it.
If they don’t agree to meet in public, run. Run fast and run hard.
>They want to come to my place, or me go to their place. I know they are hoping for sex, but meeting in public doesn’t necessarily mean that’s off the table.
I’ve found, in my limited experience, that women who want to meet up in very public places are most likely looking for the boyfriend experience.
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I message women significantly older than myself because I find the age difference thing hot. However, they always end up wanting you to take them out for lunch or shit, no matter how ridiculous you look together.
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I simply flat out refuse to meet women in public places. I’m not having another woman crying for me to take her out to places again. It was traumatising.