POF : Dating shouldn’t be this hard should it?!
39F Colorado
I’m smart, beautiful (I’ve been told), funny, loyal.
I have a great job that I love. I don’t need anyone’s money. I’m not looking for security. I want a companion. Someone I can share life with.
Someone who would be there for me and I would be there for them.
I love dogs. I love to travel. I’m pretty open minded but also straight laced.
I don’t party or do drugs.
So what else does a guy want?!
By. Trinity417
Maybe just a matter of being at the right place around the right time. Nothing you’re doing wrong it seems
Are you meeting guys?
I can tell you why I haven’t ever dated a girl. I don’t meet any (unfortunately).
I am of the belief that the media very subtly tries to tell us what we (both men, and women) should find attractive, and we don’t look for what is attractive to us. We swipe through profiles like we’re skimming through a magazine in a waiting room. It’s part of the « pump ’em and dump’ em » mindset that a lot of guys are stuck in. A lot of women like the bad boy for a while, ignoring the good guys, and a lot of guys are looking to get laid, ignoring the best women, and it seems that we don’t figure this out until we are each jaded, disillusioned, and ready to give up. I started reading profiles, and learned that there are always going to be people who do not reply (some of these are dead profiles, still controlled and used by POF), and some people will skim through your pics, and just go, « meh ». But, even among the ones that reply, you’ll find some… Uh, Interesting people. If I was wearing my tinfoil hat, I would say that I believe that app-dating is one way to separate us, as people, from one another. Make each of us believe that the only way we are going to be happy is to have just that perfect person in our lives, and make that unattainable.
What hobbies are you in to? What is the one thing that you just absolutely nerd out about? Include that in your profile. Gush about it. Make it clear how passionate you are about it. Maybe you can draw someone who’s into it just as much as you are.
For me, after I decided to start dating after realizing marriage was over, I got on PoF, and wrote a really detailed profile. I love video games and fantasy novels, and I nerded out on it. I’m picky, and wouldn’t talk to anyone if they did not share that same common interest. Didn’t care if you were a 9/10 or a 10/10, if you aren’t a gamer and don’t read, I’m not interested. We’d have hardly anything to talk about. Most of my other hobbies are directly related to books or games. I have other hobbies that my boyfriend isn’t involved in, for example, I’m a violinist.
Be interesting, have a hobby, be passionate about something. Don’t go through life, working just to earn a paycheck, go home and watch Netflix.
> Dating shouldn’t be this hard should it?!
Why shouln’t it be?
You didn’t say height?
You sound nice on paper but it doesn’t mean anything if you don’t have a personality in some way.
Thing is maybe you are very independent and that may turn off some guys, maybe they don’t bring anything to the table and know that.
Sometimes when you’re not looking it falls onto you lap.
Typically I find when you aren’t finding what you are looking for it’s because you aren’t putting out the right vibes and are attracting the opposite of what you want. The issue there usually goes far deeper. All of the things you said sound good but that is only part of the story.
You in the same state as me?
Sex and a hot body. That’s the bare naked truth. If you aren’t hot then you are going to be in for a long and uphill battle, its the truth when they say us (Men) are visual creatures.
Workout and get hot, if you are not already, you’ll see us come flocking.