POF : She had outdated pics on her profile and I basically noped the fuck out.
She had outdated pics on her profile and I basically noped the fuck out.
By. WhereAreWeNowAnon
POF : She had outdated pics on her profile and I basically noped the fuck out.
Nice way to get her to back out. Would you have actually still gone if she agreed to split the bill?
Seemed like you guys were on the same level enough to risk $20 for a meal on.
Well played. In my 20’s I was always the « go out to dinner on the first date and pay the bill » type of guy. Then I realized I was nothing more than a free meal ticket for 8/10 dates I went on, because we would have dinner and then they would ghost.
Not anymore. First meeting is ALWAYS something simple like coffee or getting a drink somewhere. It’s low stress, something I would do by myself anyway, can be a quick date if you want to bail, and cheap enough that *IF* I want to pay the bill it’s not a big deal.
The only exception is if the scheduling doesn’t work out (no coffee dates at 8PM for example, or the person doesn’t drink) we can do a restaurant but I make it clear that it’s separate checks up front. Something along the lines of, « Just so you know, we don’t know each other yet so it’s not right to ask either of us to pay for the other’s meal. So let’s play it safe and just do separate checks. Cool? » A good 50% will back out of the date soon after they realize they’re not getting a free meal at a fancy steakhouse. And that’s okay with me, because I refuse to be anyone’s ATM. The ones that agree and still go on the date usually end up being pretty good people (AKA not looking for money to bail them out.)
Related… I’ve noticed a large number of women on dating apps that will hint they need money… « I’m sad, my rent is due tomorrow and I don’t have enough to pay it! *sad emoji* » When I reply with, « Well that sucks. Hope you figure it out. » I get blocked pretty fast. It’s like they are dodging the bullet for me, so thank you!