The Difference Between Being In Love And Loving Someone
I used to confuse these two terms, like most of you, I imagine. They mix so easily.
Not only as terms, but also as feelings.
I wasted so much time crying over men who were never right for me from the start. I really believed that by losing them, I had lost the love.
I couldn’t have been more wrong.
It wasn’t until I met my soul mate that I really understood the difference between being in love and loving someone.
Nothing that I have felt before can match what I feel now.
You see, “being in love” is a form of dependence we feel on someone.
We are so carried away by them that they are all we can think of. We want to be around them as often as possible.
Loving someone is what we have when reality sets in when our hormones stop racing. It’s not addiction, it’s reality.
It is a matter of mutual happiness and growth. It is about complementing each other. It’s the best thing in the world.
To make everything clearer, let’s take a look at the 6 differences between being in love and loving someone:
1. We fall in love involuntarily, while loving someone is a choice
Falling in love is beyond our control. It’s a question of chemistry, desire and infatuation. It is about idealizing the other and putting him on a pedestal.
Loving someone is what comes after all the infatuation, chemistry, and desire. It is an emotional connection that we form.
It’s not about seeing your partner as a form of perfection. It’s knowing that they have flaws and loving them anyway.
It’s about choosing to stay even when the sunny days pass.
2. Being in love is a matter of convenience, while loving someone is giving them priority.
To be in love is to need someone to meet your needs. It’s being there when it’s convenient.
To love, on the other hand, is selfless. It’s not just about taking, it’s also about giving.
It’s about taking time for someone. It’s about taking advantage of the mere fact that your other half is present. It’s to make her feel important.
3. When we are in love we can be needy whereas when we love someone, we never are.
It is in our human nature to have all kinds of expectations from people.
It’s the same when you’re in love. We expect a person to behave in a certain way.
For example, we might want them to call or text 24/7.
One can expect big romantic gestures and constant displays of affection.
However, the reality could be different. This is why our unfulfilled expectations are the most common reasons for breaking up.
Loving someone is a matter of compatibility. It is a matter of mutual understanding.
It’s not hearing from each other 24 hours a day, but still knowing that you are loved.
4. When we love everything is a question of trust, whereas when we are in love, not necessarily
Being in love can also be full of uncertainties.
We don’t need to feel secure or completely trust the other person to fall in love with them.
We fall and we hope they will catch us.
True love, however, is built on trust.
There is no room for uncertainty or jealousy. We feel secure in their embrace, and we want that person to feel the same for us.
5. To be in love is to possess, while to love someone is to set them free
Being in love often gives us the misconception that we owe something to another person. That they belong to us.
We hold them too tight because they are the main creators of our happiness.
This is why sometimes we sabotage our own chances of finding true love. We force feelings.
We suffocate our partners by wanting them too close.
To love someone is to give them the freedom to love you back. It’s not about trying to keep them in your life.
It’s about loving them whether they’re by your side or not.
True love should flow, and you should never have to beg for anyone’s attention, affection, or presence in your life.
It’s about working as a team and growing together.
6. Being in love does not always last while love can be eternal
Being in love can last longer or shorter, but it comes to an end. It’s based on passion, desire, the chemicals in the brain that give us this addicting feeling of desire.
Love does not evaporate. It does not decrease. He does not fade away.
Love remains no matter what. It’s constant, even though the honeymoon phase of the relationship is history.
Ultimately, it’s important to remember that under no circumstances does falling in love and loving someone exclude love for yourself.
On the contrary, they welcome it.
It is only when you truly love yourself, accept yourself and appreciate yourself, that you can give these same pure feelings to another person.
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