Toxic romantic relationship: how to react? : Current Woman The MAG
What is a toxic romantic relationship?
It is a loving relationship that consumes energy. The person concerned feels uncomfortable in their relationship, they may even fear what will happen during the day. She faces a partner who can lie, explode with anger or on the contrary, gradually put some distance into the relationship. His behavior may be indifferent, even very cold.
“A toxic relationship is often due to poor communication, in which either the other takes power, or there is no communication at all, or it is based on lies ”, decrypts Sylvie Tenenbaum, psychotherapist and author of Free yourself from emotional hold *. Sometimes betrayal like adultery can lead to this loss of communication.
Thus, the individual who undergoes the toxic relationship no longer dares to ask questions, wrongly feels guilty and doubts himself. “You have to listen to your emotions, your instincts. If you feel exhausted for no good reason, if you doubt yourself and your relationship, something is wrong ”, reveals the specialist.
Restore communication
To rebuild a healthy relationship, you need to communicate with the person concerned. “Ask him what is wrong, what direction the relationship is taking, talk about his needs and his discomforts, his lacks too, indicates Sylvie Tenenbaum. The person who acts in a toxic way will thus be able to say why he adopts this behavior, she adds. If the discussion is set up and everyone manages to communicate, then the relationship can start again on positive elements « .
What to do when it becomes impossible to express yourself in front of your partner? “The couple may turn to a third person, such as a mutual friend or a therapist who can help them engage. This allows everyone to better understand the impact of their behavior and their words on the other ”, says Sylvie Tenenbaum, who advises opening the discussion by answering the following question: “What don’t you dare say?”.
When should you end the relationship?
“When we are with someone who takes pleasure in hurting us, we must run away, and often get help ”, alert the psychotherapist. Sometimes it is difficult to realize the seriousness of the situation: “We say to ourselves that maybe he will change. We don’t dare, we are afraid of being alone. The important thing is not always love, it is rather how the couple lives on a daily basis ”, reveals Sylvie Tenenbaum, before adding: “We can be too tall psychological danger and emotional. Psychological violence is a succession of microtraumas. In these situations, fleeing is the only solution ”.
If we see a loved one sinking into this type of relationship, Sylvie Tenenbaum advises to talk to him about it, to confide to him that we have the impression that something is wrong. “You have to ask him questions, dig, without rushing his friend”.
* Find more advice in the book by Sylvie Tenenbaum, psychotherapist and author of the book Break free from emotional hold, published by Leduc.s.
Read also :
⋙ Narcissistic perverts: we could recognize them thanks to a physical detail
⋙ How to protect yourself from a narcissistic pervert? Advice from a shrink
⋙ Couple: how do I know if I’m in a toxic relationship?
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