Dating : Compromise is the biggest sign of a failed relationship. Part 1

When we are young and bright-eyed one of the most heavy-hitting questions we are asked is, what do you want to be when you grow up? For most, its a Cop, Doctor, Teacher, Astronaut, Firefighter, Rich, or some type of animal (weird kid in the back). Then as we move up in age and learn more about the world, we then refine our answer and create a path on how to achieve our goals. Most choose the college route mostly because once we hit middle school, it is all about college and the future.

But as we go through life never did it cross our minds that to achieve our goals we would have to sacrifice because of a relationship. Never in our lives was sacrificing our own happiness for someone else an idea we could fathom. In our minds, we had a goal and we had to reach it. Unfortunately, life has a funny way of punching you square in the face with no remorse, and when that happens our actions become a little timid, time moves faster, our bodies start to betray us and the time for “adulting” is upon us. And at that moment love has entered our lives and we cease being an individual and compromising rears its head.

There is nothing wrong with compromising in the short term, i.e I will save this snack until tonight so I can eat it whilst I watch my favorite show. Compromising for someone else specifically for the person you love and who loves you is a selfish one-sided act. In a relationship, there is no give and take, nor should there be. If you love someone and their happiness is an objective of yours then founding a way to help them reach their goals shouldn’t cause you to lose out. If both sides are committed to the other achieving, then both parties are working together to help each other, by sacrificing something from themselves to help the other. If both parties are fully engaged and are helping the other then the need to compromise is negated.

Love does not mean to compromise. Love is sacrifice. It is not the same thing nor the same difference. Love is trust mixed with faith between two people that are on the same path to eternal happiness.

I will leave you with this, if someone loves you and is rooting for you they will find a way to ensure that you are prospering and reaching your goals, and if you love someone you will root for them and ensure that they are prospering. If you both choose to work for the other, you both will prosper together compromising nothing and sacrificing anything for that person. No one person goals are better than the next and why, because as that kid so many years ago when someone asks you what did you want to be, you never answer “To be with someone and make their dreams come true and then hopefully mine too”. So find that person who is your biggest cheerleader and who is not afraid to see you succeed because when you do you will see that neither one of you had to compromise anything.