Dating : Here’s How To Date Yourself Even When You Want To Joke About It.

Sometimes You Feel Like A Chair. Sometimes You Don’t.

I began writing this article thinking I was going to write a humor-based article about how to date yourself. I began typing away, praying that the muses of clickbait articles on love and chairs would send me a sign from somewhere above and channel its way into my brain.

Something felt wrong as I clicked away and the string of words materialized on this white screen.

I read the words aloud in my head and the message just stared right back at me like a sedentary lounge chair that has decided to permanently rest in reclining position forever.

Have you ever felt like a sedentary lounge chair before? A chair that has tried to remain upright for the longest time when eventually the bolts loosened and it felt like it was beyond your power? That eventually, when you decided you’d recline yourself, you never got back in the upright position ever again?

You lost some screws and bolts when you broke from underneath yourself.

You’ve felt broken for awhile and so you lay there… like a sedentary reclining chair that was once a whole lounge chair before.

I know how trivial it may sound. I know that you’re not a chair, but try to hear me out.

Sometimes dating yourself feels like comparing yourself to a broken chair.

People talk about chairs like they talk about dating oneself.

“So are you dating anyone?”

“Yes. Myself.”

“…”

or the conversation can go the other way:

“So what’s new with life?”

“My chair…”

“…”

It cuts both ways. Discussing dating yourself is like discussing the importance of chairs. The conversation will always get awkward.

We all need to be okay with saying what we want to say whether that be about our relationships with others, with ourselves, or even our chair.

We joke about relationships like we don’t care.

Deep inside, we do. We just hide behind a mask and prance around like we’re okay when we’re not.

The only way to confront the issue is head-on.

You actually need to go on a date with yourself.

Figure out who you are and why you hurt so much inside.

Figure out what makes you tick and what makes you cry with tears of joy.

Learn what really stops you from dating yourself. You won’t know until you do it.

Take a chance on yourself. Take a chance on dating yourself even when you don’t feel worthy of the love that you are capable of showing to your broken self.

We’re all broken — some more than others — but what’s the point of waiting to date yourself until you are ready and you’ve got it all together?

We’ll never get it together.

Dating and loving ourselves is a journey we need to do together. Real love is a journey through hell or high water.

You don’t pick the moments to keep and discard. You need to accept your whole being and come to terms that there is beauty in all that brokeness.

How To Date Yourself Even When You Feel Like A Broken Lounge Chair

1. Accept That You Are Broken

Let’s face it. We hate the feeling of being broken. We want to be perfect. We want to be perfect for ourselves, for the people we love, and for our potential significant other. When we continuously strive for perfection and wait until the “perfectt” time, it never happens. We lose our dreams, our chances of true connection, and the time we could be spending in the present moment with loved ones. Accept that you’re broken. Be willing to love yourself. Even if you’re broken, that doesn’t mean you have less value.

You are more extraordinary that you can ever imagine.

2. Get Rid Of The Things That Make You Feel, Think, and Act Like You’re Unworthy

Just get rid of it. Maybe it’s social media or unhealthy friendships and relationships in your life. Unplug and be okay with getting away from the world to spend alone time with yourself. When you can actually be away from the noise, you can figure out who you really are. You can go on a “date” with yourself to learn who you are.

3. Add or Discover What Breathes Life Into Your Soul.

When you get rid of all the distractors, you’d be surprised at what is possible — the impossible like sedentary broken chairs sprouting wings.

When you decide to really date yourself and only yourself, you discover who you are, what you believe, and what you are capable of. You will be able to get out of the sedentary state that has marinated within you for all of this time.

Whatever is life-giving, pursue it.

You don’t need to joke about it any longer. Date yourself and see what happens.

You might even fall in love.

With love. ❤