Dating : It’s LinkedIn, not HookedUp.

Networking? Yes. Canoodling? Not so much.

For the sixth time in as many months, I’ve heard the same story from female colleagues — it’s an odd story, a surprising story, and quite frankly, a creepy story. What is it? Random guys using LinkedIn to hit on people. Am I missing something? It’s very likely, since as a middle-aged man, I am by definition ALWAYS missing something. But REALLY?

I assume from pop culture that there’s no shortage of dating sites and apps that do a completely adequate job of matching people up, whether they want a relationship or a quickie in the bathroom of a club. You can swipe or grind or match to your heart’s content. And when Rihanna sang about “finding love in a hopeless place, I assumed she meant Twitter. Even old high school sweethearts find each other on Facebook. Like I said, lots of sites and apps, even unintentional ones. But, LinkedIn isn’t one of them.

Can we not keep it professional in just one place, fellas?

Do resumes and tiny circle avatars really turn you on? (Not judging, but it is a little odd.) Every story starts with a connection request and ends with a bruised ego. One colleague, even after spurning a LinkedIn Lothario’s advances, was then actively stalked by him via e-mail and other social media. Another no longer uses her picture on the site. A third (and I love this response) screen grabbed the whole flirty convo, including the rejection, and forwarded it to the HR person at his company — who conveniently was also a LinkedIn connection.

I get it. People flirt. And considering they spend at least a third of their day there, they flirt at work (I should know, I met my wife at the office). But to specifically try to connect with someone you don’t know at all, on a professional networking site, with the sole purpose of trying to get a date, just seems…ewwwww. Moreso when you can’t take “no” for an answer. So besides parking lots, grocery stores, and sidewalks, women now have to virtually look over their shoulders just to post their resume online.

And then there’s the why. I mean, as I tell my kids, I think people only continue to do the same stupid stuff because at one point, for one person, they lucked out and it somehow worked. Some idiot was actually rewarded for their bad behavior. For example, I assume construction workers only catcall because once in 1928, Betty Jean McGillicutty turned around and said “thank you.” So, I’d assume that somewhere, somehow, one of these guys hit on a woman on LinkedIn and actually got some kind of positive response. UGH.

Congratulations, guys. This is why we can’t have nice things. Have you been asleep for the past three years? Does #MeToo ring a bell? DO BETTER. Again. UGH.

So let me say it loud and clear, especially to that creepy guy in the back who always turns a discussion of “previous experience” into something gross — LINKEDIN IS NOT A DATING SITE.

That is all. And congratulations, recruiters, you’re now the SECOND least liked group on LinkedIn.