Dating : Presidential race

It was decided. It was time for the United States to finally take a new step. After centuries of improvement of what the Greeks dared to call democracy, despite of excluding women and slaves. Not to mention the fact that there were slaves in Ancient Greece.

The good thing is that there was a big evolution and it was really possible to experience decades of democracy closer to the ideal. The downside is that, even so, elected officials often remained politicians with little or no competence at all, as well as highly dubious intentions.

It was then that someone came up with the big idea. In both the Ancient and Middle Ages, many rulers were chosen among the best warriors of the people, in epic challenges. In this model, at least one form of competence was tested at its limit.

A model similar to that of ancient times was needed. Of course, without the violence that our wild ancestors used to love. The solution should have something more advanced, a touch more consistent with our condition and, above all, evolutionary intention. So it was decided: the next president of the most powerful nation in the world would be determined in a Mario Kart match.

The world stopped to see how democracy would evolve. On the one hand, Tidem. On the other, Brump. The two sides that fought in furious debates and on social media finally, would have a really reliable way to find a winner. It didn’t matter how many people wanted to vote anymore, the power of polling stations and nothing like that. Skill is what would determine the next elected.

After weeks of training, the two candidates were ready for the race. In a stadium in Washington D.C., with no public presence, but broadcasting worldwide. Bookmakers registered records at a political event and the odds remained balanced. How to accurately analyze something so new? It was impossible, everything was in the hands of fate.

The time has come, Tidem and Brump side by side. And the race started. Despite the training week, the technical level of the competitors really looked very bad. While one had great difficulty in reaching speed, the other was more concerned with looking for turtle shells and banana peels to cast on the opponent than actually running.

After some time that demanded great patience on the part of the spectators, the two reached the final lap. Tidem was in the lead, and managed to overcome the bananas thrown by Brump. Some, even outside the game, which was not foreseen in the rules established for the event. Still, Tidem was about to win and would be the new president of the United States.

Within seconds from the victory, Tidem fell into a deep sleep. He quickly dozed off and even snored a little. At this very moment, the incredulous audience saw Brump’s character cross the finish line. Brump with his hands up was celebrating, but strangely he didn’t carry any joystick.

Soon, the camera shifted and revealed that someone else had played the final lap in place of Brump. A reporter tried to interview the mysterious invader, but he understood nothing, because he only spoke Russian. And that is how, once again, the Republicrat Party won the presidential race.