POF : 30 Male here. Women stop responding, is this typical experience here or other sites? Care to critique my profile? (long rant inside)
I feel like I’m doing all the right things. I read profiles before messaging. I weed out the people who post only 1 or 2 lines or who can’t use proper grammar. I only message people who I legitimately feel we may have some things in common. We chat on the site for a week or two before I offer to text instead as I feel it’s easier to communicate, or I ask to meet up for dinner. I get a « yes » response. Then when I ask when are they available I never get a response. I’ve never had a meet up. Even if we’ve been texting I give them a few days to respond then give them one more text « I understand you may have been busy, are you still interested in meeting? » No response.
I’m not upset and not surprised. I figure with all this online shenanigans people have so many options that it’s easy to be choosy as you can easily browse so many potential matches a day versus having to make effort and actually go out and be social. Maybe themymet someone else. But after weeks or months I still see their profiles as activate and online now so they obviously haven’t’ found what they wanted.
Would anyone care to critique my profile? Am I just ugly? Be honest. Or is this just typical of online dating?
https://www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=187185540
By. Novakingway556
Add more higher quality pictures of yourself.
Imo. Remove the « wants to get married » just looking for a relationship.
But yes, this is also very typical of online dating.
Hi there,
First congrats on your weight loss, that is a tremendous achievement. Opening up your profile for critique takes guts ( I could not do it). But here is my is advice:
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* Add more photos (avoid the bathroom selfie, the in the car selfie, the holding a fish photo, and the bar bros photo or photos with other women) The fish photo is not a deal breaker for me but for some women it is
* Every line of your profile starts with « I ». Yes, you are talking about yourself but try to revise this. « Though I am not super-religious, I am Christian and abide by the golden rule »
* Actually it DOES appear that you are super religious, so while I revised the syntax of your sentence, since « Christian » is in your headline and your first paragraph, it indicates otherwise. If you are super religious then own it, don’t try to add an escape clause
* I would change « looking for someone to marry » as it can read as desperate. I always interpret this to mean that the man will pop the question to every girl he has a second date with. Instead put long term relationship. It is implied that if a LTR works that you will be married
If you are ok with these suggestions, then I would start out with these and post back.
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This is typical. Make sure when you ask to swap numbers and text, you say you are happy to keep it on the site for awhile if she prefers. Giving out your personal phone number is a step, and some men are pushy and condescending if they are told not yet.
For me it would be a no, but not due to looks (I am not religious and dont support private gun ownership (Australian, things are different here)).
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Profile suggestions
* Add a couple more pictures. At least one full body.
* Regarding religion, given you have selected christian other, I would define what other is in your profile.
* If you are not super religious then you need to not prioritise religion in you heading and first sentence. If you plan to keep the heading as is, I would just get rid of the first sentence.
* I would restructure it a bit. A paragraph on hobbies and interests. A paragraph on what you do, your weight loss journey (congrats btw) and the « I believe everyday » sentence. A paragraph on what you are looking for in a woman (this is where you could put your values; e.g. looking for a conservative, Christian, woman who believes in the Golden rules, etc and our second amendment right. Also put a couple of other attributes that are important to you, e.g., independent, educated, social etc).
* Get rid of the dont drink smoke etc, this is already covered by the standard POF questions.
Personally you need more than one picture of yourself. I am a girl and I always like when guys have lots of pictures. I believe you can add up to 7. Have pictures of yourself with friends and having a fun time. Showing them things you like to do
It obviously is not about your profile if it gets to the stage you are describing. Most people on POF do not really care about the other’s profiles. They will look at the pics and do a quick scan through but that’s it.
This is very typical for POF. Women will drop off like flies. No explanation or anything. Just stop replying out of the blue. Even if you think it is going well.
Its not you, there’s a lot more men than women on the website, the women who stop responding have simply found someone they like more.
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Men are like a product that women always find a better version of.
Women just use these sites for personal validation. For every 10 that reply, i’m lucky if 1 goes longer than 4 messages. And for every 10 of those, I might get 1 actual date.
With online dating, don’t be too picky with girls’ grammar in their profiles. Getting a reply is hard enough, you don’t want to shrink that pool of potential mates.
As for your profile, you might want to add a few photos where it is not a selfie.
EDIT: don’t put up pics where you purposely look goofy, unless you want goofy looking girls.
Keep yours short and simple. You have it too long and it’s boring to read. Short and simple. Don’t even mention hobbies. Mention where you’re at in life.