POF : irrational? how to take this?
So I’ve been talking to a guy from POF for a week. We live about an hour from each other unfortunately, but there is cars and train. We’re not a plane ride away. It COULD work…
We’re getting pretty close all this chat time leading up to the first date..we both have the same intentions and goals relationship wise…
Our first date is coming up this Friday night. We both REALLY like each other . Video chats, Instant messaging and calls every day the past week. We’ve been sharing a lot…
I like to focus on one person, so I’m not chatting with anyone else currently. I could – but I prefer not to. I think it hurts to see he’s online right now while we’re chatting on messenger this morning.
UGH. It just makes me feel used before I can even get to the first date? I want from someone what I would give them – the fact that he’s been online regularly (i pop in just to see and sure enough, he’s online again!) bothers me.
Perspective please?
By. KitchenGadgetHoar
If he’s using the phone app it has you logged in all the time you are connected to the internet.
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Even if he’s not, the « online now » thins is not accurate, there’s roughly a 20 minute delay before it changes to « online today »
A week is not very long to really be thinking like that, if things are going well between you two, and you guys have the same intentions, I am sure things will work out. If he is religiously using the app, maybe bring it up with him after your date if things go well, tell him you are uncomfortable with him still being on it if he wants things to continue recommend you both delete the app while talking to each other.
Will say this though I bet he is checking to see if you are using it also thats why he goes on. I do that sometimes to see if who I am talking to is online. I am just like you I tend to talk to 1 person at a time and give them my time.
You have not had a first date yet so it is normal that he is online and active on the dating sites. The dating sites only show you as active when you are using it at the time. So if you are on the phone and using the app the second you kill the app, it won’t show you as online and active. It only shows you as active when you are using it.
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Personally if I am heavily talking to a guy and we haven’t met then I am on and active on the dating site. After a first date still on and active, by date 5 I am on but not really active. Date 10 my profile is hidden, the second we become exclusive my profiles are all deleted.
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He is probably still active as he is not fully sure as to where this is going to go