POF : Is this person real? Why would they do this?

POF : Is this person real? Why would they do this?

A beautiful girl agreed to a date on pof. We exchanged numbers and we got to know each other a bit over the course of a couple days prior to a date time she agreed to within a few days. She asked to move the date time sooner, which I obliged. I wait 30 minutes past the date time and she no shows to the date. She gets back to me saying her toddle stole her phone. Reschedules for 3 hours later. Doesn’t show again. Responds later that night that she fell asleep waiting for me and was really sorry and it wouldn’t happen again. We text later that day and I tell her to set a time that works for her and told her nonchalantly it was the 2nd strike. She said she was on her way, as she was just sitting watching tv. I should head down there and meet her there in an hour. Asks me for a pic, doesnt respond and doesnt show up. Doesnt ever get back to me. I didnt give her any sensitive info. What exactly was she (if it was a she) trying to accomplish. How do you avoid getting your chain yanked around like that. Why would she invest so much time in getting to know me? I am not upset emotionally, just trying to learn from this so I can maybe meet my future wife eventually,

By. jejuwakejo

What do you think?


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  1. You can expect to be jerked around in the future, but I’d like to think THAT level of disregard is unusual. That is obviously very fishy and strange.

    What I find very common is women (and I’m sure men do it too) who act interested, say they want to meet up, and then go silent when you suggest a specific plan. I think a lot of people are online for a confidence boost and don’t actually intend on dating through the app.

    My rule of thumb: try to avoid being the one making all the effort. If I feel like I’m the only one trying to arrange a date or keep a convo going, I get out.

    for someone to jerk you around that hard is (hopefully) not a normal occurence. But if that happens again, don’t give a second strike. When she doesnt show the first time, Just text and say something like « too bad we couldn’t meet. It was nice chatting with you. Best of luck ». And move on. Don’t let anyone take advantage of your eagerness.

  2. My advice for you is this: If she’s not on time for the date, then she’s just not into you. I would’ve left it at that and moved on to the next one.

    Sucks that you went through all of that though.

  3. She probably saw you and walked away. Some women on there are not stable just like a few men that a good friend has mentioned to me in the past.

  4. She probably was not sure if she actually wanted to meet you and kept trying to blow you off. When she asked you for a pic the final time she wanted to get a good look at you to see if it was worth meeting up with you in person. She probably wasn’t attracted to you and after seeing the photo she realized she wasn’t interested in meeting you at all. Rather than tell you that she decided not to show up. I am sorry but as a woman I am going to call her a bitch! That was wrong of her to do to you like that.


    I have had this happen to me once with a guy and I was wicked pissed off. If you do not want to meet then just tell me that, don’t keep giving me excuse after excuse. Personally I think you gave her one too many chances. Don’t ever chase after a girl. Find a girl that will run with you not away from you. Watch I bet you down the line if she has not found anyone she will try to contact you and want to meet with you.

  5. Beautiful…that’s the hook. Or successful…or something.

    Used by men and women, to set you for a scam.

    Even if it’s not an outright financial scam, there might be other issues.

    So put in effort if the other person does.

    Keep your guard up.

    Other issues can be drugs, mental issues, etc.

    And some mental issues can take years to show up directly, so you are looking for symptoms.

    Look at that gorgeous, beautiful person by themselves…..don’t be blinded.

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