POF : So, a question about all the rudeness on POF.
So, my buddy signed up with POF a couple weeks ago, took the time to write out a well-written, well thought-out profile, and has even stepped out of his comfort zone to approach several women on the app. However, he has been met with nothing but silence and/or rudeness since he signed up. It happened to me when I used to use the app, as well and led to me cancelling my account and getting rid of the app. So, mostly, he’s encountered a lack of response to his messages, but today, someone he’s never messaged before UNTIL today responded with one of the most hostile responses I’ve seen. « Not interested. Leave me alone. » was her reply. Is everyone on the site this rude and hateful?
By. AXELUnholy
Most men have a wider range of what they deem acceptable and attractive… Whereas most women have a very narrow range of what they deem acceptable and attractive.
Most women dismiss 80% of the male population and only have an interest in the top 20% of males. OK Cupid has proved this with studies of their own members, and it’s been proven in many other studies when it comes to dating/attractiveness.
Most women simply have an extremely high standard of what they deem as a worthy male that is good enough to talk/date/sleep with them.
before the Internet, average guys had an easier chance to talk and interact with women. Most women had a very small social circle of men to choose from. So even if you weren’t the best looking guy out of the seven or eight guys that she was kind of interested in… You could win her over with personality, charm, sense of humor, etc.
Now… With the Internet, social media, and dating sites… Even if you try to talk to her in person, she still has 50 other guys that are much hotter than you giving her all kinds of attention and kissing her ass on all the social media sites.
Even if she doesn’t meet those hot guys on the Internet, it’s still changes a woman’s perception and there’s a very good chance that she’s going to compare an average guy against the hot guys on the Internet and it’s going to make average guy a lot less desirable and attractive.
And sadly it’s not just POF that has rude women… It’s pretty much the same on any app that you use.
That’s about par for the course.
I gave PoF a shot a couple years ago when trying out a handful of dating platforms. My experience was that PoF felt like all the women from the nearest 100 trailer parks were all exclusively given accounts in my area. I did go on one date, that was OK I guess, except mostly she just talked about how great her little boy was (and I’m sure he was, but come on, first date?).
Tinder, OKC, etc all seemed really normal. Mostly normal girls, mostly normal dates. It was like PoF was connected to some different, trashy dimension.
Good luck.
Step 1: be attractive
Step 2: don’t be unattractive
Seriously, POF is very meh these days. Maybe try Tinder? At least there’s one level of vetting.
Just giving some female perspective…my friend recently convinced me to join POF. I’ve never done a dating site before. I get the feeling guys on there will message anything that moves in the hopes that they get a response. They don’t even read your profile. And 90% of the time the messages are « you’re gorgeous » or some sleezy pick up line. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a confidence boost but it gets overwhelming when you have 25-30 of those messages a day. And it’s like, you want a relationship but that’s all you can come up with to talk about?
Just a girl’s perspective.
I only reply to those guys that put a little effort into their messages, but at the same time I have my own preferences as well (no smoking, live within 50 miles of my house, can’t hate animals)
I’ve tried every profile setup possible, none with any success. Some accumulated more activity but I still got ghosted nonetheless. Even after a successful date I get ghosted?? There’s no rhyme or reason.
I’ve just deleted my profile since because I don’t even care anymore. What’s the point in trying if girls don’t have to and won’t? I’d rather be single at this point.
Yeah I mean I can’t really speak to the girl who was outright rude, I’m just giving another perspective on why some girls may not respond at all.
I’ve been a member for around 7 years. It sounds like your buddy has gotten even more replies then I ever did. As I’ve as that sucks, it just proves that it’s not just men that are assholes. Given the chance women are even more aggressive and condescending.
She probably thought she was responding to someone else. Alot of women try to chat with multiple men to see which one she favors you probably just wrote at the same time some dude pissed her off.