POF : Why do people get so upset or assume you aren’t interested if you don’t respond right away?
I noticed this a lot lately. I don’t always get to check POF right when I get a message unless I am in a deep converstation with a guy on the site. Sometimes though I will get a guy who will send me a message and we will be talking, then I will get busy doing something for a friend or I am just busy with family, so I don’t get to respond right away and they get all upset.
I have sometimes gotten messages that went from 0 to crazy all in a matter of 5min.
Please just give me time to respond and don’t assume that is such a turn off
By. [deleted]
Alot of guys have no confidence or game and when they feel rejected they act like a child. It’s a sign of possessive behaviour so take it as a good thing you are weeding them out quick.
[deleted]
It’s not excusable to flip out on anyone, but please understand that most guys trying online dating will send dozens of messages to girls just for the vast majority of them to get totally ignored, or they will maybe get sparse responses and eventually get ghosted. Sometimes their patience might just run thin and they feel better by lashing out I guess. You have to understand that it can take a toll on their self-esteem. Again – I’m not saying it’s an okay thing to do and personally I have never sent an angry message to someone but on some level I understand the frustration.
I only follow up with those I’ve exchanged messages with and only if I haven’t heard back from them in 3-4 days after the initial exchange. If I don’t get a reply after a opening message I assume they’re not interested and that’s the end of it. And I always follow up in a playful manner, something along the lines of “you’re not playing hard to get already are you?”And the response rate has been decent, with replies of either “I’m sorry I’ve been busy” or “I don’t get on here much at all”
I’d like to think most men approach it the same way, but I’ve heard horror stories similar to yours. It amazes me how people think they can act so clinically insane on that app when they wouldn’t even think twice about behaving in such a manner in a real world setting.
I feel like a lot of people online don’t have decent social skills sometimes. They also don’t get girls get more messages on average. I have had to tell people in the past to cool off and give me time to respond.
It really depends. Granted, sending toxic messages or being an asshole is wrong, but I get that guys aren’t going to wait for god knows when for a lady to respond. Usual, if there’s no immediate interest, especially if they viewed your profile, then it’s basically a sign that nothing’s going to happen. Nobody knows what the other person is going to do, whether they’re going to respond or not. And not everyone has the time or patience to treat everyone like they’re special and hope they respond. So while I don’t condone the assholish behaviour, you also have to understand that in online dating, a lack of immediate response (when the person is online/ views their profile) is typically a sign that it went nowhere.
Some girls do it on purpose to test how much patience the guy have.
No because alot of women take days to reply or stop chatting because they found someone more to there liking.