h2>Dating : Why you should be submissive.
The idea of being submissive in our modern times has a negative connotation for most part. The image that comes to mind is an oppressed woman or a weak man being bullied or controlled by their partner. Now the most simple definition of what it means to be submissive is “ to conform to the authority or will of others; meekly obedient or passive”. I want to play with that definition and pick it apart and list a few reasons why that might not be so bad.
They are better!
We have all had points in our lives where to rebel against something invoked a feeling of self empowerment where we felt as if we were asserting who we are in contrast to the system or entity we refuse to conform too. I would instead invite you to consider that your partner has a different set of strengths and areas where they are more knowledgeable or capable than you. Personally I only seek partners where the above statement can apply as the ability to utilize each other’s strengths makes for a greater team.
Is your wife an expert on cars? Did your boyfriend get a degree in finance? These are things to appreciate, learn and respect. Identify where your partner excels and allow them to be the leader. This more often than not will lead to the optimal outcome in situations where they are better equipped but it will also give them the opportunity to feel supported and respected. Imagine how you would feel if your partner undermined or questioned your judgement in a subject matter that you invested time and effort in. I by no means believe that you should never question your partner but there is a time and place to do so in a constructive way. They may be better at something but that doesn’t mean they are always right.
It’s Their World
This might be different for different couples however when it comes to issues pertaining to something that significantly impacts your partner more than you it only makes sense to allow them to have more of the decision making power. If my partner has an issue with her family member while I expect my opinion to be heard and considered ultimately (especially before marriage) I understand that they have more skin in the game and as such they should be allowed to have more of the final say because they will have to live with the results.
While ultimately you and your partner should make choices and live as a team you must also realize that you are not the same person. Their job, their family and other elements of their life may impact you and include you but you must identify, respect and understand that for some things you will be a voice but may not have a vote.
United Front
Disputes in public happen from time to time. It may be with strangers, friends or even family. Conflicts can be difficult and stressful. One of the best comforts during these contentious times is knowing you have someone who has your back at all times in public even if you are wrong. I am by no means telling anyone that they shouldn’t be honest with their partner however I am saying that after the conflict in private may be a better time to have that conversation. Of course there will be situations where your partner’s mistake must be pointed out but more often than not doing so in public can lead others to see the divide and try to take advantage of it.
