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POF : PSA when someone kindly says they are not interested….

POF : PSA when someone kindly says they are not interested….


That does not give you the right to flip out on them. Be appreciative that they took the time to respond to you instead of leaving you hanging.


By. Bostongirl4444

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  1. Out of 35 pr more messages I have had three people tell me I’m not interested or we won’t match, all good.

    I have said it to others myself and I have been told off only once, but not my issue maybe she was having a bad day.

  2. For many years, in my youth, I felt nothing but hatred and loathing for women because during those many years I would send thousands of messages and not get a single reply. I always thought that those women lacked decency and consideration. I thought that it would only be common courtesy to reply and say you aren’t interested.

    Now, I’d rather not get a reply than get a « sorry, not interested ». Women are getting hundreds of emails each day. It would be a full time job to reply to each and every one of them. Just like this original poster said, a lot of the guys are going to get pissed and lash out anyway. And what is wrong with keeping your options open? If you reject every guy, what happens if you change your mind later on and decide to give one of them a chance? Better to just not reply or say anything at all. Plus this is expected behavior. There are a quarter million women online at any given time, and almost all are going to choose to ignore you instead of say « sorry, not interested ». So eventually a guy will get used to it.

    Having a woman say « sorry, not interested » doesn’t do a damn thing to make me feel better, because in the end she is no different than a woman who doesn’t reply at all. Both don’t want anything to do with me.

    It’s all in the attitude. If a woman is nice about it when she says she is not interested, that’s great even though it means I can’t ever message her again. But if she’s nasty, that’s the worst thing ever. Too many women are nasty and condescending when they reply to men. For instance, I messaged a good looking BBW ([https://pics.pof.com/dating/1140/43/12/6e92dfc13-dabe-436e-bd22-553bd3392a17.2.jpg](https://pics.pof.com/dating/1140/43/12/6e92dfc13-dabe-436e-bd22-553bd3392a17.2.jpg)) asking her about this weird metal device that she had in her mouth. It looked like someone put a bear trap in her mouth and that it was forcing her jaw wide open ([https://pics.pof.com/dating/1159/74/37/142a86be7-4cdb-4cb9-a1ce-1e466cf5f706.2.jpg](https://pics.pof.com/dating/1159/74/37/142a86be7-4cdb-4cb9-a1ce-1e466cf5f706.2.jpg)). She explained that it was part of a game that she got for Christmas and played with her family and some kids. Then we added each other on Facebook. I reminded her who I was and she wrote « Oh yeah, you are that creep that is open to dating bigger women. no thanks LOL ». What a fucking shit way to talk to someone, especially when I did nothing wrong. It’s women like that, that make me see red. Unfortunately, that is how most women are.
    EDIT: Oh yeah. I forgot to mention that I took a page out of womens’ books and I no longer bother to reply to women that I am not interested in either.

  3. I never got the point of replying to tell someone you aren’t interested. Just don’t reply at all. It’s the same thing and gives the same message without engaging.

  4. I absolutely applaud you for taking the effort to be polite and responding. It used to be taught to everyone as a standard behavior back in the day. Now ghosting is common and people don’t understand why they can’t communicate or actually bond with anyone else when they can only deal with « the happy ».

    Personally I respond to every woman who contacts me. There are a lot of angry dudes on here and just as many narcissists. Rather unfortunate.

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