POF : The reality of online dating, as a man, you don’t matter, to anyone.
Women on these sites are harsh and cruel, and lack common courtesy.
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I have found that women are notorious for fucking off halfway through a conversation, not saying a thing about it, not saying they are shooting off out, not saying they are tired and going offline, not saying they are going ona goddamned holiday and won’t be about to talk-leaving you messaging them once a day to see if they want to chat and looking like a fool because it was not reaching anyone.
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Bringing this up usually gets me called entitled, and I get told « nobody owes me anything », does that include civility?, are we all supposed to be stupid, selfish, uncaring pricks to everyone we meet because « nobody owes you anything »?
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Jesus christ these things will give me a heart attack one day.
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C.o.m.m.u.n.i.c.a.t.e for the love of god, it isn’t hard, use some words, say goodbye, say you have to go, say you won’t be on for a while, act like you have some level of decency, if that’s too hard you can just pretend you care even a tiny bit.
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It does seem like as a man I am not even worth letting know my messages are a bit wasted if she isn’t going to be on the other end or able to respond for the weekend, am I not supposed to give a fuck the very minute it seems she isn’t talking?, if i didn’t care to chat I wouldn’t be in the first place!
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Go away rsoxgal, you’re a loon!
By. Serveradman
Well that’s not really true at all. From a females perspective, guys are pretty harsh, cruel, and uncourteous in POF. In fact, I think more so because they try to be players, pervs, or hookup hungry. I know from my experience, guys are pretty wishy washy. They tend to disappear for days, weeks, etc. and then decide to come back with no message about leaving and message like no amount of time passed. By that time, I’ve moved on because no none can wait for ya. Even with all the replies, girls gotta sift through all the crappy quantity of messages for quality guys. It’s not fun at all. You run into a few girls who might do this sure, but girls get this on an incredibly level and when you get that many guys doing that, it tends to rub off sometimes. Dating sites are cold and turn warm people cold and indifferent. That’s my constant battle at least.
Make yourself a female profile and experiment in your own skin what a woman goes through in a daily basis in that site, pure shite messages from deluded pricks.
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If someone stops talking to you it just means they aren’t interested. Take your L and move on. Maybe you’re not attractive, maybe you’re boring or maybe it’s nothing to do with you but no one is obligated to continue messaging anyone.
> »nobody owes me anything », does that include civility?
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Yes, you incel
women fuck off during a conversation bc a hotter dude messaged them, thats the main reason. 75% of the time its got nothing to do with what you thought you said its bc they got a better offer and didnt need you anymore. women flake bc theyre bombarded with so many guys that there’s no guarantee you’re gonna be guy no 1 for long.
Online dating is unfair to all involved.
That being said we are all selling or buying a product, ourselves.
You should be changing your profile and has much as possible your attitude till you achieve reasonable results.
Part of the initial messaging is assessment. I was having a lot of responses similar to yours. I changed my profile, if you read you know what expect. I get fewer responses, but better quality responses.
I am planning on changing some aspects of my personal life, by next year hopefully, knocking on wood, that should enable me to have a better profile.
I strive to be truthful, because online dating sucks for all, I try to be a good experience, if it doesn’t work out I still share a coffee or a beer and I get a great hug.
And the reality of online dating, AS A WOMEN, is exactly the bloody same. This isn’t a gender issue, although some may argue it is not an issue at all.
This is why I stopped bothering with dating sites and started talking to women in person…..Most men need to realise that they’re doing themselves a major disservice by using dating sites. Like seriously, why compete in a competition that is extremely brutal? Where I live you’re talking about 50+ men for every one woman on pof etc…..The ratio is totally crazy and it’ll only get worse.
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OP. Delete all online dating programs and only talk to women in person.
Yes, its annoying and yes, they don’t owe you anything. This is coming from a guy who just got a text 2 days later from a girl I met on POF several days ago. I empathise with how frustrating and disheartening it is, but the fact is that they don’t owe us shit. The whole point of dating sites like POF is to meet people and see how you jive together. If they reciprocate meaningfully to the conversation or initiate it themselves, chances are high that they have some kind of interest in you. Maybe after talking for a bit they find out they’re not really compatible so they drift off. It sucks, but it is what it is.
So yeah, I wouldn’t care too much if a girl stops talking to you. I’ve got used to it now and its still a little frustrating for sure, but there are so many other people that its probably not very long until you’re talking with someone else. You get used to it. Just focus more on yourself and don’t have any real expectations from girls you talk to, just go with the flow.
With an attitude like yours I’m shocked, just SHOCKED that you’re single.
For hot men they’re the most communicative beings on Earth. Just abandon it, if you’re not an 8 or above you’re invisible.
I agree, sadly it is how it is. Women have way too many options (if they are even semi-attractive) as soon as they start talking to you, another guy gets their attention so they drop you and move on to chatting with him, then they do the same to him.
They will flake on you, ghost on you, fade on you, or drop contact with you at any moment, no matter how much they flirted with you or how interested they previously behaved. Men do it too, but I’m sure far more women do it.
Women look at online dating like shopping on a tight budget. « Oh I like that purse, wait, no I like this other one, no this other one matches my dress, no this other one has the design I like. »
Very short attention spans because of how much is available, they cant make up their minds.
Unfortunately like deciding what they want to do or eat, they can’t make up their minds.