Dating : I always feel like I’m not good enough for my girlfriend
I have been dating a girl for the last 7 months. I’m asian (Korean), she’s an outrageously gorgeous latina, and even though I’m in love with her, this situation is weird to me. She’s not only gorgeous, she’s also very smart and educated, funny, and an easy going person. Idk, most of my life I’ve felt invisible to women, and then I found a girl who is perfect and likes me too, I don’t know how to react to that. I constantly feel like something will go wrong anytime. She knows how I feel about it, but she doesn’t really understand my point of view. Her family is very nice to me and haven’t said anything about me being the only asian around them, but her friends saw it as something « unusual » because she has only dated white guys in the past, all of her friends are white, and I can feel that they don’t like me very much. She always treats me very well, and I can’t complain about her. I love her, but there’s always the feeling of not being good enough, and I constantly think she’ll end up falling for someone more interesting than me. Has someone in here ever been on a situation like that? I feel like I could use some advice.
To the point straight up advice. Stop with the excuses on why you can’t or shouldn’t be happy in your relationship.
She is into you, she was into you before you two got as close as you are now, she wants to be with you and likes/loves you enough to bring you around her friends and family. If you’re constantly oppressing your mind with thoughts of not being enough then you are absolutely not going to be enough for her or anyone. We can all nit pick things we don’t like about ourselves, our insecurities, our lacks BUT what is that?? How are you **living** in the **right now**! Bcz right now you’re blessed to be in a relationship with someone who not only you like but likes you back!
Stop self loathing, stop with the self defeating and negative thinking. **YOU deserve** an amazing life with amazing people in it. Keep taking those steps forward to achieving everything you set your mind to do. On that SAME note, STOP with the thoughts that bring you down and not lifting you up.
I’m asian biracial, I’ve dating women who some may say are physically out of my league, have higher education, or made (past tense), more money. But I learned that my who I am will always be greater than who I want to be. Bcz who I am is Happy, and healthy, and lives in the right now.
You need to work on your self esteem and self love.
If you THINK you’re not good enough for her it will eventually come true – not because you’re not good enough. Because you believe it.
Self fulfilling prophecy.
Time to work on improving yourself in all the ways you can think! You’re worth it so make your life reflect that too.
I’m in a really similar situation at the moment too! I’ve spent 6 months with an absolutely PHENOMENAL boyfriend. Maybe he will eventually break up with me, realise how dumb and boring I am…. BUT until that moment, I’m going to do my best to be more educated, fitter, hotter, funnier and more caring than anyone he’s ever been with before. I’m absolutely striving to be my best for him, because he deserves the best.
Everyone has their insecurities, maybe your gorgeous Latina loves your brains and sensitivity, and it sounds like you would be modest, and caring, too? Good luck with it, I hope it works out!
I struggle with this too. I just gotta give myself a pep talk sometimes. “She likes you. She tells you she likes you. She shows you she likes you. Believe her.”
She’s with you, not someone else. Just enjoy it.
It’s definitely understandable I’m sure it goes both ways to some capacity for the inadequacies you feel but remember that at the end of the day she choose you not those other people to date and what’s in the past is in the past. As for her friends not liking you not really sure they could be protective/vigilant.