Dating : Courting/dating “out of your league”?
So I’ve started talking to someone recently from another city (we matched on tinder). We’ve hit it off so well so far and she is amazing! She’s a major socialite, highly driven, tons of connections, already owns property, and is incredibly sexy-the whole package! Everything I’d ever want in a woman. She’s really into me too, always answers calls & texts, willing to chat, very flirtatious. We have fun convos & connect well. We actually are planning to travel to meet in person at the end of the month!
Here’s the thing. I bring good stuff to the table but I’d be lying if I said I think she’s a league above me, certainly she’s head and shoulders over anyone that’s ever been interested in me before. She also has mentioned she gets approached a LOT though isn’t the type to actively court male attention. I’ve only recently started coming into my own financially and socially, so she’s almost intimidating (tho I’m one for novelty and taking risks). I try not to put her on a pedestal in my head too much, and I’m not a big believer in the idea of “leagues” period, but it’s hard to say she isn’t well ahead of where I’m at now.
Has anyone had a dating experience like this? Maybe I’m being taken along for a ride, right? The whole thing is just unreal, I’d like to hear people’s thoughts.
Been there. I matched on Tinder with a girl from another city. She seemed way out of my league. She has traveled all over the planet, and I had never left the southeast of the United States. She had pictures of her on snowy mountaintops at 12,000 feet up, and the tallest mountain I had climbed was the 600 foot « mountain » in my hometown. She was absolutely gorgeous, fit, etc. I’m not ugly, but I’m naturally thin and don’t workout all that much. She seemed super social with lots of friends and I have a very small friend group and we do things like play boardgames in the basement.
Basically I felt totally out of my league, but that almost made things easier. I went on the date thinking « this probably won’t work out, but at the very least I’ll hear some cool stories from someone who has a lot more life experience than me. » and that took a lot of the stress out. I wasn’t anticipating anything going further than the first date so I just relaxed and let myself be fully me.
Long story short I married her.
Don’t worry about leagues. All that really matters in a romantic relationship is that you connect emotionally and have physical attraction and are at least reasonably compatible with no deal breakers. Social and economic status and relative levels of physical attractiveness aren’t really important.
Of course any time something seems too good to be true, it’s wise to be alert to any signs that you’re somehow being taken advantage of, but romantic relationships can and do cross « leagues » so don’t assume it’s not real unless you see signs that it isn’t.
Dude, if she got interested in you, the only league you belong in is in the league of legends. Just let it flow and keep doing what you’ve been doing, that’s what got her interested in the first place. Hope it turns out well, brother.
She could be lying as most people do online
At least wait until you meet before making any rash decisions
More importantly, It seems like you have a made the cardinal sin of putting already putting her on a pedestal
I think you’re jumping the gun a bit here. You guys haven’t met in person yet?
I understand your fears but she is a grown woman who knows what she wants and right now she’s interested in you :). don’t sweat or overthink it you’re doing great otherwise she wouldn’t even be dating you especially if she normally doesn’t give guys a shot. enjoy your time and this new experience, I wish you the best!
First dont think that anyone is « out of your league « . You mentioned that you have things going for you and so does she. If she wasny interested in you she wouldn’t be talking to you. In terms « success » people go at many various paces and its okay if it taken you a little bit to « match » her but you shouldn’t feel the need to to impress her . Do it because you want to feel proud of yourself . Hopefully you will have a fun meet up
Dude! Yes, go out! Have a great time! Date people you want to be with. Sound like a great possibility. Always date people that you admire and really want to be with (great if you think they’re outta your league).
If there’s one thing I’ve learned it’s no one is out of anyone’s league bro
Make sure you actually like her for her personality and not just the superficial stuff.