Dating : Advice?
I’m a 19 y/o female and I’m tired of being alone. I want a serious relationship but I don’t have any opportunities to meet anybody.. I tried online dating but nothing has ever happened beyond texting for about an hour and then something happens; they ask for nudes, to meet up asap, want to do lsd, or even wanting me to watch them jack off over FaceTime lol…
I just want somebody to be there for me. As I want to be there for someone too. I guess I’m looking for someone who is more interested in me than my body.
Advice?
Scroll a few posts down in this sub and pick one of the many dudes in this sub that are forlorn and love lost too. Message them and make both your day.
First and foremost. Your OLD experiences are reflective of you and your tendencies. Are you taking non-sexual photos of yourself? Are you posting pics of you in flattering positions? Are you filling out your profile, and indicating that you are looking for something serious, and are not here for hookups? Are you on OKC and answering those « compatibility » questions? If you’re on OKC, you can filter out the men who don’t want LTRs. You can filter out by religion, height, body type, monogamy, child(ren) from other relationships, and other stuff, so you only see men who you want. I’ve had great success with this.
I STRONGLY recommend that you get back out there and take it more seriously. Do NOT entertain the messages from assholes who « just want fuck ». Don’t respond. Don’t read them. Just delete them, or don’t. ONLY respond and read the messages from men who meet your criteria and this will hopefully make it easier.
I’m afraid but online dating is much more about sex than finding a relationship.
How come you don’t have any opportunity to meet anybody? You are 19, don’t you partecipate in any activity? School, work, hobbies?
Honestly? You’re probably going to have a hard time at 19. A lot of people your age are going to be more interesting in enjoying their newfound freedom, and are more interested in partying, going on adventures, and experimenting. It sounds like you’re a few steps ahead of your peers in regards to life stages (you already finished college? Wow). This means having a relationship on terms you’re comfortable with is going to be a tall order.
I noticed you said you didn’t have many friends. Maybe you should try looking for that first if you’re lonely. You draw and paint? There’s probably a community group that does that. I’m sure you can make friends there.
If they are asking to meet up on a date and you are turning that down then you are shooting yourself in the foot. When I’m on the scene I’m not looking to text someone for weeks on end. I want to meet and see if there is any chemistry. The point of a dating app is to go on dates.
> Advice?
There isnt really at your age. Most men at 19-20 years old are immature or entirely focused on sex so finding that one guy your age who wants a genuine relationship is going to take a lot of work.
You just need to keep searching and talking to guys. Yeah majority of them are gonna be creeps in one way but at your age is when your dating pool is at its largest.
Try a different age group, like 27+. See how you like it.
I’m kinda in the same boat. I’m 25M and lonely. I work in an industry where most of my female colleagues are much older and married so never get to meet someone. Online dating sucks. Why don’t people want to go out on genuine dates anymore. Smh.