Dating : Age difference
I’m going on a date tomorrow with this guy I met from tinder. I know this is probably bad but I forgot he’s 33 and I’m 24. I was looking at his tinder profile and I realized “oh my gosh he’s 33”. Is that a bad age difference or is it normal? I just wouldn’t know how to tell my mom that I’m going on a date with a 33 yrs old. She always says that if you’re dating someone who is in their 30s then you have nothing in common. I just wonder if that’s true.
It’s not inherently a bad thing, but do be careful. If you spend any time on r/relationship_advice you’ll see so many stories of abuse in which there was close to or more than a 10 year age gap (and the couple met when the younger person was in their 20s). So many predators, particularly older men, seek a younger person because they are inexperienced and easier to manipulate than someone their own age.
Honestly, a good person that age wouldn’t actively seek out someone 9 years younger – and I say that as a woman who dated a 24 yo when I was 33 yo! (In my defense, we met IRL and I didn’t know his age until after we were friends for a few months) Like your mom warned, we had very little in common. He was naive on a lot of things and quick to agree with me which was a huge turnoff, plus it was gross thinking about the things I remembered happening during the year he was born. Made me realize how much I value someone in the same lifestage as me.
I think if you had met naturally it wouldn’t be a huge red flag. However since you met on tinder where there’s an age range it makes me wonder if he’s talking to 18 year olds too. Overall, any age gap should beg the question of why wouldn’t they rather be with someone their own age? It could be that he’s fetishizing youth, immature, manipulative looking for a younger girl that’s easier to control, or all or none of these things! I’m 24 too and I only recently realized how detrimental older men can be to the trajectory of our dating lives, and it’s not talked about nearly enough.
You’re both adults. When I was 19 I dated a 27 year old and wound up marrying him and having 2 kids (were divorced now). My parents weren’t thrilled at the time but they grew okay with it (the age difference isn’t why we divorced).
33 ÷ 2 ) + 7
yeah 24 is all good 🙂
being in different life stages though can be challenging. been on both sides of that and I
wasn’t able to get it to work.