Dating : Probably overthinking it
I’ve been dating a guy for about a month, we connected on tinder but already knew each other from college (we met only once or twice). So far we’ve been on 5 dates, about once per week, 4 of them one on one, and the last one was at a BBQ where I met his group of friends. It seems to be going pretty well and I do like him, however I will go sometimes 2-3 days without hearing from him. I’m not a huge texter myself, but it is kind of strange and uncomfortable for me to not have that communication. I’ve been just dealing with it and haven’t brought it up because it’s so early and I want to play it cool.
This Friday my friends are going out for a bday/going away party, and I’m thinking about inviting him. I also have a wedding in a little over 2 weeks and I’m thinking about inviting him to that too (for an old college friend, so he may know people there too). Obviously I need to text him soon about Friday, but also I want to give him enough notice for the wedding. But I feel weird being like “hey do you wanna come to this event and then also this event?”. Feel like it’s too much and I’m coming on too strong. Should I ask him out for Friday today and then wait a few days for the wedding? Or just do it all at once? Also, how would you deal with the lack of texting?
Anyways, I’m probably being neurotic and overthinking all of this, let me know your thoughts!
Just invite him to the thing this Friday today. Then, while he’s there you can ask him if he wants to go to the wedding with you.
Ask him about the Friday event and let him answer, then ask him about the wedding. It’s not that big of a deal. He sounds like he likes you, he may just not be on his phone that often.
If it really bothers you that much, ask him about it next time you hang if you want to talk every day or whatever.
You really don’t have to talk to someone every day, I personally think. Especially if you also see each other face to face frequently. That doesn’t sound super worrying so far.
I wouldn’t go ao far as to invite him to the wedding, usually being someone’s « plus one » to a wedding can be seen as a pretty big deal and that may be a little too much too fast. Of course you could just ask him that: would you want to comw or or is that too fast?
Ask him straight up and just let him know what you think? It shouldn’t be a great deal. Some guys love texting as soon as they see messages others not so, so have a chat and find out if he is or isn’t the texting type and what he thinks of the relationship.
Clearly you are interested in him but it seems like he is a busy guy living life and doing stuff. So just ask him that you enjoy texting once every day and ask him to do it. He will say yes or no. It’s that simple.
It’s like people have jobs or something, not to be too snide, but you cannot expect that level of communication if you’re not exclusive/have that level of intimacy. Just my two cents 🙂
It should all be effortless just talk to him, as for lack of texting ask him where he stands . Its just communication , it should smooth sailing if the feeling is mutual .
Contrary to what some have said, I think it would be best to let him know what you are up to this weekend, but let him make the decision to desire to come. It’s a little too direct to come off and invite him with you especially because you are not in a committed relationship. Be patient and if he truly likes you he will let you know. When men like a woman it is not a mystery that he likes her. It is clear as day and if it isn’t, you will have your answer. Best of luck to you!
Text: I have two events coming up, event 1 on so and so day, and event 2 on this different day in a month. Are you interested in attending either with me?
That’s it. Make it simple. He can choose none or one or both with this question. You leave it up to him. Then don’t ask again. I think this is the least pressure.
Just text him that you are going to a birthday party and wanted to know if he would be interested to join? If you both are having a good time in the party, then For the wedding you can ask him face to face
May be a common tactic used in dating, called « push pull ». Seems to be working since not texting you for a time makes you interested even more.
It’s just my guess though from reading way too many dating advices lol
As the others have said: just do it, don’t overthink – you’ll be thankful later that you just did it
If he brought you to his BBQ it’s a good sign. It’s time to invite him into your tribe as well, if you feel good about him. I’d invite him to the Friday thing, the. while you’re there ask him about the wedding. IMO the wedding is probably a bit short notice, not that you shouldn’t ask, but I’m just saying that if he agrees to do that – he’s really into you and it’s time to become “official”.
I think not hearing from someone for a few days is super normal. Other people disagree… so we go our separate ways. If you’re not happy with it, ask if this is something that he sees changing or if this is his norm and see if you’re happy with the answer.
6 weeks is too quick for wedding invitation. Also kind of shitty to your friend who you would presumably have already told you’re bringing a plus one or not?
Own your standard! If you like dating someone who texts every day, then tell his guy that. If “playing it cool” is causing you to not get something you want then you’re settling. It’s not like you’re asking for grand conversations all day, you just want to be acknowledged. If he makes you feel uncomfortable for wanting that then he doesn’t like you enough anyway.
invite him to the wedding first then when he says yes, say: oh and since you’re coming with me to that would you also mind coming with me this friday