Dating : Psychotic question: when dating someone how long before you stop logging into tinder?
This will make me sound psychotic I know.
I’ve been dating a guy, it’s still very very new so I’m not at all angry or even really hurt that he is still on tinder. But I can’t help but feel like maybe he isn’t that into me, or maybe he isn’t thinking I’m long term material or I dunno…. there’s a lot of questions I’m having about it.
He isn’t changing his profile or anything but since he’s not in the city currently his distance increased. Now he is visiting a friend a bit closer to where we live so it went back down again. I know I’m psychotic for even checking, but I was curious to see if he would log in while away.
Background info: we’ve been dating each other for about a month and a half now, but for the past two weeks he’s been away. He still texts everyday, mostly good mornings and to ask about my day/ tell me his plans for the day. Says he misses me, sends heart emojis all the silly texting nonsense. Before he left he tried to introduce me to his friends and said they all were curious to meet me (good sign if he was telling them about me, better sign if he wanted them to meet me I thought).
Point is, it’s way to soon to talk exclusivity in my opinion, but at the same time I was hoping he wasn’t actively searching for other girls. Perhaps that is naive of me. I’ll see how all of this plays out, and maybe talk to him about exclusivity in the next couple months. For now I’ll vent to you guys about my craziness and welcome any advice or whatever.
So I ask you dudes of reddit, when dating a new girl how long before you stop checking tinder?
Edit: thanks for the pep talk gents. I will keep things light between us for the time being and hope for the best. If he doesn’t bring up exclusivity before, maybe I dunno October?, I’ll ask him myself. Despite the tinder weirdness I feel like things are going well between us, and I really like him so I’ll try my best not to jinx it.
I won’t delete until things are exclusive. I have been ghosted enough times to realize that nothing is for certain, and so I might as well have a couple fish on the line in case the one I’m reeling in breaks off.
As soon as I make it official with her. After asking her to be my girlfriend if she says yes I delete the app immediately.
Until you have an exclusively talk, he may keep getting on tinder. Perhaps he’s just keeping his options open in case it doesn’t work. But it sounds like it’s going well with you two.
Probably about 6 months. He expects that you’re on Tinder still as well
A lot of time it’s simply out of boredom. You go swiping cuz that’s what people do when they’re bored.
until you discuss it with each other about being exclusive
My ex deleted it after we went on 3 dates in 2 weeks – but these dates went really well. I asked him on the 3rd date to show me how tinder looks like for guys, and he showed me that it was deleted from his phone already.
Tbh that gave me a lot of reassurance that he was sure about me and wanted to make it work early on, but I also know that’s not the “norm”. I’d say that if you’re going on dates regularly, communicating really frequently etc, that people just generally stop having the time to go swiping on tinder so much.
But yes, just cuz he’s online doesn’t mean he’s actively looking at other options. He may just be bored and plus since it isn’t wrong given that you guys are exclusive, he didn’t see a problem with that.
as soon as i realized there was no one else i wanted to talk to but him, i deleted my accounts. had no interest in anyone but him.