Dating : Does past trauma make me ‘undesirable’?
I was physically and emotionally abused, and I think I’ve finally gotten to the point where I can say that I’ve more or less come out the other side. I’m definitely not *not* fucked up, but overall I’m doing pretty well considering the bullshit I’ve gone through.
I don’t broadcast that I was abused, but sometimes it pokes through a little in (more or less) minute ways just because it’s nearly impossible to completely conceal something that dominated my life for so long.
If people can tell that I have past trauma, does it automatically make me less desirable as it could make me seen « unstable » (which I’m really not, I’ve gone through a fair bit of counseling and overall I’ve got myself handled pretty damn well)?
You sound awesome. Be yourself. If someone does not have the empathy to accept some stuff from your life, find someone who does.
Mostly it causes one to be prepared….
If it does, it’s not your fault.
Youre not damaged goods. Not everyone is going to be prepared to learn about your past but thats not your fault. A good way to start a relationship is to learn how to love yourself first and realize what you have to offer.
not really.
but don’t expect a full support on the first date.
if they ask (wich is not polite) « yeah, i’ve been throught some shit but i don’t like to talk about it »
For past trauma you should seek help like therapy and psychiatrist, not everyone will understand you and your conditions
I hope not. My biggest fear is my abuse (that makes me NEED love) will be the reason i don’t get it in the first place.
If they deem you undesirable for that, you’re probably better off.
No it doesn’t. You’re making things complicated with thinking about being good enough / having fault at not being desired.
Sadly all thinking and rationalizing in the world don’t fix emotional pain.
Yes