Dating : Any advice for this deaf person?
Hello, everyone. I’m the deaf person who also could not speak, which it seems to be dealbreaker/turn-off to many people. I tried online dating but nothing good came out of it as always. I would like an advice on how to meet new people after college as a deaf & mute person where I could eventually meet my partner who accepts me in future, I’ve even never had a serious relationship in my life and I’m 27 years old who cannot speak but could only communicate with sign language or notes. Thank you
Fuck me… That’s a bad situation. How about get in contact with other deaf ppl? Probably stupid advice, but this is where I would start.
Please don’t get me wrong, but it seems to me quite difficult for a handycapped person to get in contact with non handycapped.
I partially feel your pain because I am quite hard of hearing and it’s definitely not a turn on for most people. I can even communicate somewhat normally, I can’t even imagine not being able to speak or hear at all. Most people do not speak any form of sign language so they assume a date would be awkward. Are there any groups around like through Facebook or even Meetup where you might meet others with similar circumstances? I would think the important part would just be meeting people you can communicate with.
Hi, I think there are some really nice conferences where you will likely enjoy more success, not to mention meet interesting people in general. Such occasions will focus a population in one place that would increase the potential of finding someone with whom you are compatible. Either way don’t give up 🙂
Like others have said, try to get involved with the deaf/mute community in your area.
I’m not sure if you’re into video games at all, but you should look into something called vrchat. You need a vr headset, but there’s actually a pretty large dead/mute community in there. It gained a lot of traction because you can actually sign using the controllers. It has its own dialect since the controllers are limited, but it’s easy to pick up on. I actually learned a lot of asl in vr. They also have pens so you can just write stuff. You can try it on desktop mode before you invest in a vr headset. But honestly, it’s pretty cool being able to play a video game and be able to sign to people.
Do you live in an area or have access to one that could potentially have hearing impaired meet ups? Even if you don’t meet someone there that you’re interested in they are going to know people that can sign that maybe someone you meet through them will be the one
Lmao I’m Deaf 30 years old guy, came from Deaf parents. There is no way for me to date with hearing women. I don’t know. Communication is important to me, and I’m uh.. like to chat a lot too.
Following this thread, it might gonna to be interesting later on 🙂
me personally i would not have a problem dating a deaf person. there is somebody out there. do not give up hope, your man will come
I would have zero issue dating someone who was deaf or mute. Communication would be tricky at first, but I’d be 100% down to learn ASL. (Or whatever SL you use where you’re from). I’m not hitting on you, btw, just saying that this isn’t a deal breaker for most people, I think.
But if you are only interested in dating other deaf people, you may want to consider moving.
A larger city would be a good idea.
Yea, if you can’t lip read you are limited to people who can sign. This is a tough one.
It’s silly to think someone wouldn’t be accepted (or just be a deal breaker) because of their disabilities/handicap etc. There are people out there who have similar or worse going on with them and still manage to find love with someone who accepts them for who they are. Don’t think you can’t be with someone who isn’t handicap just because you are. That’s not how that works, and you don’t have to limit yourself just to people who are like you if you didn’t want to.
Yes, it may be difficult communicating with someone who doesn’t know sign language but that is something that can become easier over time especially if the person of interest decides to learn for the benefit of you. There are people who are not mute but are perfectly fine without talking verbally if it can be helped. (I’m one of those people.)
Just don’t let dating apps be the reason to put you down. You have the whole world in front of you and multiple resources.
As far as advice goes…
Just don’t stop. Don’t put yourself down because of something that makes you- you. I know, corny but it’s true. Try going to local areas like a coffee shop, library, or find local groups based on hobbies. A sign language group? There’s people who go just to learn.
Damn, that is not an easy situation to be in. Online dating seemed to be a good start, since it starts mostly with texting. But I see that you already tried that (try maybe another app?)
I used to work with someone that was deaf and he was a member of several groups on Facebook/Discord with deaf people and he found his current girlfriend through one of these groups. So maybe that’s a good way to try for you too.
I mean I think some people may be more open to it than you think. There’s a deaf and mute girl that works at my local grocery store that seems to be in her early to mid 20s and every time I go I seek her out to help me with my order because I think she’s insanely cute and I get joy just out of communicating with her on her little typing pad. If she asked me out I would accept in a second. I have also been thinking about asking her out myself my only problem is it’s very hard to ask any questions about her personal life (to find out if she has a boyfriend or anything like that) when in the grocery store environment as everything is on the little notepad and I don’t want to take up too much of her time.
As someone else mentions above I would literally learn ASL if I was seeing someone that spoke sign language. I know that may not be the case for everyone but I’m already studying a subject in school that it would be beneficial for and why would I not take the time to do that if I liked the person.
Hell I’ve been seriously considering learning ASL just to ask this girl out from the grocery store and she might be taken or entirely uninterested.
Sorry to ramble about myself but I’m just trying to give you the perspective that it may not be as. It if a burden in dating as you see it as. While I do realize that it present some issues that others may not have to deal with I would say if you open your mind up to the fact that there is a person out there for you that would love to be with you even if your are deaf. You may not have met them yet or they may be someone you run into everyday that’s too scared to ask you out.
I wish you the best in your search for that person but I do think that they are out there somewhere 🙂
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