Dating : Asking too much?
I’m in this sort of long distance relationship with a guy, right now our only form of communication is over WhatsApp because he deleted his Facebook a few months ago.
We don’t call or video chat, just message. I have an iPhone so it tells me how much time I spend on the app daily, weekly, etc. And lately it’s only been less than 20 minutes a day. I feel like this isn’t enough communication for a relationship to work out. I want more time with him. He works full time and has his kid over sometimes, but even on his days off he will not respond to messages for 12+ hours at a time.
I mentioned to him that I’m feeling neglected and would like more attention from him, but it’s like he doesn’t care and just tells me he’s emotionally drained. I’m not trying to make his life more difficult by just asking for attention, but I feel I deserve at least a bit of undivided attention..
Am I asking too much? Should I just drop it and accept my measly 20 random minutes a day of communication? (Never consecutive, this is 20 minutes total over the course of a day, a message here and a message there)
Or is this grounds for breaking it off?
If you have any questions feel free to ask. I tried not to include too much irrelevant info.
Get out asap. He is showing you how much you mean to him…listen.
You’re not asking too much to want communication in a relationship. But THIS relationship doesn’t seem like it is working for him.
It’s grounds for breaking it off. It’ll always going to be a difficult situation being in a long distance relationship
Most likely the amount of attention he pays you won’t increase. Playing devil’s advocate: sounds like he’s overloaded with work and basically stuff in his life
With it being long distance and no video calls there will be a disconnection in terms of he perceives you emotionally. The only way forward from that would be arranging a Zoom call once a week at a specific time
If you wanted for it to continue you should push for that. The situation you’re in is he can’t empathise with you because there’s stuff right in front of him and you’re far away, if that makes sense
And no, you’re not being unreasonable. For you, emotionally it’s probably better if you break it off. For one, the attention will never increase and there maybe times it’ll decrease, maybe even substantially if there’s something that needs his attention