Dating : Going to turn 26, is it going to be impossible for me to find a boyfriend?
Feeling lonely like I’ll always be alone
Is it weird that I’m 25 and never been in a relationship? I tried putting myself out there but kept getting rejected even though I’m told I’m pretty. I get stared at by guys but never approached.
Now love islands on tv, I get upset. 3 years ago I was watching love island and craving a relationship and it still hasn’t happened, not even sex.
Went on some dates last year and even though they went well I still was ghosted 🙁 ruined my confidence and even though I want to date now, in September I have to move away again . I’m constantly moving away I wish I was settled but it’s where work takes me.
Also, guys.. I’m going to be 26.. does that mean I’m going to be less attractive as men seem to be going for younger girls? I’m starting to go grey and allergic to hair dye 🙁
I’m sorry sister. You deserve better treatment from others and yourself.
First things first: 26 is not going to make you less attractive. Neither is gray hair. You sound like a wonderful person who deserve a great guy. Please understand that guys ghosting you is not reflective of, but them. Also, definitely more difficult these days for dating and relationships.
I didn’t have a real relationship until I was 27.
You being in your « prime » is really only considering one factor. Dating might get more difficult on that one factor, but easier as you gain experience/confidence/etc.
There were two big things that made being inexperienced particularly frustrating for me.
1. **Advice that people give usually applies to their own life, not yours.** I like the metaphor of watching Magnus Carlson win a Chess tournament. I can play the exact same moves as Magnus, but it won’t win me any games if I ignore the board in front of me. You can’t just blindly play moves from someone elses game and expect success. Yet, that’s how most dating advice is given.
2. **Not knowing Etiquette or Norms made me feel bad about nearly every interaction**. This is inevitable, as everyone comes to dating with their own ideas about « how it’s supposed to go ». Some people think the third date for sure means sex. Others believe it’s 100% the guys responsibility to make the first move + pay for dinner + etc. In reality, everyone is all over the place with this kind of stuff, and people dating rarely take the time to talk about their expectations. I figured out eventually that I just needed to form my own etiquette and set of rules. Figuring out what everyone else wants or what the norms are is an impossible task, given how sealed off most of people’s dating preferences are.
A therapist that specialized in relationships helped me work through these two.
I don’t think it’s werid to not be in a relationship at 25 as there are many many men who are in your position. No, I don’t think your age will hinder your dating prospects. When reading your story I get the feeling I’m missing some details to why you’re currently unsuccessful. From your post history it seems libido could potentially be a factor and the fact you don’t find the men in your area to be attractive. Feelsbad for my tea loving bruvs. Never seen love island so I don’t know how much bs is in that show but I’m familiar with 90 day fiance in terms of reality tv. All I can guess at is to maybe develop some self awareness (to find strength/weaknesses) or maybe traveling.
I’m 25 and I’ve never been in a relationship. This is the first time in my life I’m trying. I started with a post on r/r4r to help get over my fear and I downloaded Bumble today. At some point we just have to start trying.