Dating : 30m I don’t even know what I want in a girl
Yes I’m a virgin (life is a meaningless void of pain and suffering from wich there is no escape or purpose)
When people ask me what kind of girl I like it’s hard not to say « I don’t really care as long as she’s doesn’t have a kid »
I don’t care about girls personalities or interest at all. I just want a girl who exists I will change anything I have to about myself and do any hobby just to share something with a girl.
Anytime I meet a girl who’s single I do my best to try and present myself (but I’m not good enough so she says no) and when I find out she has a bf my brain just kind of powers down.
There’s a girl I like right now that I’m trying to pursue, but if I really sit and think about it the only reason I like her is because she’s single. That’s all it takes and I’ll start to fantasize about a life with someone.
What should I look for in a girl? I’m just so sad and desperate I’ll take almost anything g
Even if you got a girlfriend you’d still be miserable. You realize this, right? Women are not rehabilitation centers for broken men.
[deleted]
If your not comfortable being alone you can never share you life with another person.
Your problem isnt that you dont know what you want in a girl. The pressing issue is you dont really seem like a person of value given the fact that you’re that thristy.
Imagine if you were a girl, would you fuck you honestly?
I have been in relationships since I was 14…non-stop. Married and divorced once. I have never asked out a girl but somehow ended up in relationships by getting to know people. I went out of my way to participate in social activities that involve mixed gender situations.
We don’t know what we should want. Sometimes you just need to hang out long term with people without thinking about this and build rapport and then move to the next step. Dating works for some people. But there are people like us that just need to live our lives. Go do something out of ordinary for you and really get into it. But make sure there are women in it.
Do you have any hobbies or interests? How do you spend your free time? Girls want to be with someone who they have similar shared interests. Im sure theres people you encounter at work, school, on the street, wherever where you know you have nothing in common with or be friends with. So its sort of the same thing just with genitals involved. Thats what a girlfriend is, someone who you share similar interests (but not all with) and you share how much you care about one another through other physical interactions. Changing your likes, beliefs, interests etc will not make someone like you more. You just need to be you. If you dont have any interests, try to find some. Like solo travelling, gym, learn something new, take a course, etc. Once you find what you like, youll have something interesting and unique about yourself that you can discuss with a potential partner. When you meet someone while single, do you just agree with everything they say / like with no interest or understanding? Girls can pick up on that and it doesnt bode well. If you just want to get laid, and I mean no disrespect, get an escort, go to Amterdam (you get the travel part out too) OR just focus on you and things will fall into line. « Sad and Desperate » is like a strong cologne and girls can smell it. If you take time for yourself, focus on you, develop some new hobbies or interests, I guarantee you will meet someone. Put yourself out there, mix up your routine. If parties or social events at work are happening, put yourself out there and go. No single girls are going to just walk into your apartment. Final piece of advice, and this important. When you meet a new girl, dont even think of dating, act as if shes a guy / someone youre not interested in. The thirst wont be there, and youll just get to know someone. If she likes you, youll find out. But if you come on too strong / thirsty, they can smell it
Get past the nihilism first before dealing with your issues with women. If everything including your pain and suffering Is meaningless so to is any relationship you try to build.
I hate how prevalent and widely embraced nihilism is in our culture these days.
Ask a nerdy 20 something out. Just your age will make her think your experienced and godly. Stop being such a pussy about this and face it.
First of all, the whole “I’m a virgin so life is meaningless” rhetoric is a toxic mentality to have. Your life shouldn’t have worth based on whether or not you’ve had sex. Some people have, some people haven’t, some people don’t want to because they’re asexual, etc. Secondly, when you say it doesn’t matter what kind of girl as long as you get a girlfriend, that raises a red flag. You’re putting a lot of worth on having a gf but it makes it seem like you only see that hypothetical someone as an accessory in order to lead a meaningful life. Big yikes. Lastly, you mention your hobbies, which have a pretty big community, and there are plenty of conventions like GenCon that would be great opportunity for you to meet people with like interests. It seems like you are ready to categorize girls with similar interests as you as not attractive, which first of all, continues to promote the idea that “geeky” or gamer girls are all unattractive? I also don’t think you should change your entire personality for someone, that’s actually not a healthy thing to do. I think that you should focus your energy on enjoying the things you like and stop focusing your energy on finding a girl as your end goal or prize. You’re also only 30, you have literally the rest of your life to find someone, don’t feel rushed if you feel like you have to find someone by a certain age or something.
You need to work on your self-esteem and depression. The things you say about women just reeks desperation. Love the person in the mirror first before you can love anyone else. If you really want to just get any girl though, you can try going to third world country and find a wife there.